I hung up on the doctor, and called off work as I made a U-turn for the hospital.
"can't you drive faster you stupid car?" I yelled.
When I finally got there, I asked the front desk lady for Harrys room.
"take those stairs to the next floor, and it's the third one on the right." she told me.
"thanks." and I ran up the stairs and to his room.
"oh, Harry." I gasped and tried to hold back tears as I walked over to the hospital bed he was lying in.
I took in his appearance. His leg was all bandaged up, his right arm was in a cast, and his face was deeply cut and bruised in certain places.
"Chloe!" He smiled, holding out his tattoo filled arm for me.
"hey, don't ever scare me like that again!" I cried, running into his grasp.
"it's okay, babe. I'm fine." he said, burying his face in my shoulder. I felt a tad uncomfortable with this small bit of physical connection with him.
"just a few cuts and bruises." I felt him smile between my neck and shoulder.
I started laughing at his comment, but still crying at the same time.
He released me from the hug and leaned into me and kissed me on the lips. "I love you babe, never leave me." he said.
I was completely off guard, and didn't know what to do. Then I remembered what the doctor said about the memory loss...
"um, Harry.." I started, trying to tell him this the easiest way possible. "we, well..... we aren't together anymore. We broke up about two months ago, Harry."
"what?" he looked puzzled.
"the car accident caused memory loss." I tried to explain to him. "what's the last memory you have?" I asked, curious.
"of you and I in my apartment, watching movies on the couch with Niall."
Oh god, we're in deep.
The last memories Harry has are the times me and him first started dating. About a month or so into the relationship.
I thought it was odd he only lost about five months worth of memories, but I guess everyones different.
"we can still make this work, right?" he asked.
"Harry, no. You might not remember, but you hurt me. You hurt me so bad and I don't wanna go through that again. Memory or not."
"but I didn't do that! Well, whatever it is that I did.."
"yes you did!"
"no, I'm not that man."
I rolled my eyes.
"Chloe, I didn't do it."
"yet. You didn't do it yet. Doesn't mean you won't do it again. I know you. You changed A LOT in those four months we dated. There's no way in hell I'm doing it all over again."
I didn't want to leave because I just got there, and besides, no one else was here. so I just stood frustrated, with my arms crossed.
"baby-" oh no he's not gonna persuade me into being with him again.
"I'm seeing someone." I said, catching him completely off guard.
"what?!"
"Ashton."
He held his face in his hands and shook his head like he couldn't believe it.
"I hate myself." he uttered.
"no, Harry, don't feel like that." i tried to assure him.
"can you at least tell me what I did to ruin what we had?" he asked, looking up from his hands.
I paused. Oh crap.
"umm.." I started. I didn't know how to say this.
"Well, I felt like the trust was already fading, and then you went and.." this is hard.
"what Chloe?" he asked impatiently.
"I caught you in bed with someone..." I said finally. "a guy."
I looked over at him. His face was wide, a horrified expression showed.
I stared at the blank wall, letting my mind take me back to that awful day.
"I had just come back from work, and I saw your shirt on the floor. I had just assumed you were home and tired, not wanting to pick up your dirty laundry. I picked it up for you and walked into the bedroom.."
I paused, taking my lip between my teeth to hold back my emotions.
"I heard....some noises..and just thought..." I stopped.
"and then I opened the door and saw you with him. In the bed, together." I felt like an idiot recapping all this for him.
"and, after I kicked you out, you told me that it wasn't the first time you had cheated on me. You did it with all those other girls.." I continued, remembering it like it was yesterday.
"you lied to me. I asked if those rumors were true, and you lied. I some how could sense there was something you going on that weren't telling me, but...well, yea." I stopped, realizing I had just been deadly talking.
"baby, I'm- I'm just...I'm so sorry." he said as his eyes began to water.
"don't." I said, just as I did when he tried to stop me from leaving; Just before he turned on me and told me it was better with every single other girl.
"well I don't know what to say. I mean, right now, I love you. There is nothing I wouldn't do for you, and..." he stopped.
I watch in shock as he reached behind him and grabbed a big needle from the little table.
"I don't deserve to live!" he screamed as he attempted to stab the long needle into his stomach.
"Harry stop!" I shouted, rushing to take the needle out of his grasp.
Who the fuck would even leave a needle that size lying there anyway?!
"I want to die!" he screamed. "I'm tired of being alone! I'm tired of people telling me I'm a horrible person just because I get so overwhelmed, and there's nothing I can do... I just- I just want to die."
There was a long pause. Before he continued his speech.
"no one likes me. Niall won't even talk to me, and I assume it's because of what happened with you. Louis and Liam won't answer their phones, and Zayn and Perrie are too busy with the wedding."
"I just feel alone; like I don't belong anywhere. I feel like the world hates me, and the girl i love doesn't even notice how sorry I am." he said.
"I know you're sorry, I just don't wanna fall in love with you again just to have you hurt me a second time." I told him.
Just then he handed me the long needle.
"can you please, please just kill me." he begged.
"Harry, stop. I'm not gonna kill you."
If he's this unstable, how is he going to be able to stay by himself without doing something insane? He's going to have to stay with someone; but who? His parents live in England, so maybe if I can get him a flight there I can trust he'll be okay?
How did I even become the one responsible for him anyway?!
" I need to go talk to one of the nurses or something." I told Harry.
"About what?" He asked, looking up at me with those sad eyes. He is so fricking irresistible.....
"About who you're staying with when they release you. There's no way I'm letting you be by yourself under the conditions you're in." I said to him.
