"Hi Liam, good morning."
"Ehy Corey, how ar-"
Right now? My sperm.
Oh God no.
Liam runs.
***
"Why weren't you at school?"
Theo storms in Liam's room with an annoyed look on his face and a grey t-shirt very tight on his shoulders. Liam thinks vaguely of all the eyes that must have lingered there at school that morning. Maybe he should have stayed.
"I came home sooner."
"Yeah, I see that" Theo snorts, still standing on the doorway. Liam rises in a sitting position. Maybe Theo wants to do the kiss thing again. "Why?"
"Because of my best friend's sexual life, basically."
Theo blinks, but he doesn't ask additional information. Maybe he too gets scared by other people's sexual life sometimes.
"Couldn't you text me? I waited in the parking lot for..." Theo doesn't finish the phrase, because it's ten past one and his lessons ended at one o clock, like every Monday.
Liam smirks, sceptical. "For almost thirty seconds?"
Theo shrugs. "Yeah, well, obviously I wasn't gonna wait for you like we had a date or something."
Liam nods. "Obviously."
The room falls into silence, then Theo talks again.
"Do you wanna go out?" His voice sounds impatient, like he's in a hurry or something. Is he serious right now? God, the audacity.
Liam glares at him, indignant. "Are you throwing me out of my room?"
Theo blinks again. He seems lost.
"No, I..." Then he suddenly turns evil. "I hope Mason's sexual life kills you."
He slams the door so hard a crack appears in the wood. Liam stares at it.
That dude is such a lunatic.
"Can you kill someone with sex?"
"Why are you mad at Theo?"
Liam looks at his phone, incredulous. What does Theo have to do with anything? Why is Mason so obsessed with him? Liam never saw something more ridiculous in all his life.
"Anyway, I think you can if you try hard enough." "...Hard enough, you get it?"
There must be something like a dating app but for new best friends, Liam is sure of it. Mason's days are numbered.
***
"Wait, did you mean going out with you? Like in a date or something?"
Liam just broke in Theo's room and is now staring at him, eyes wide open.
"No" He replies cold, not moving a muscle.
Liam would look stupid lying there with crossed arms while staring at the ceiling, but Theo manages to make it look like a smart thing to do.
"Oh. Yeah, well, better for you, because I wouldn't go on a date with you" Liam feels a little petty now. "You're an evil lobster."
YOU ARE READING
The Kiss Thing (THIAM)
Fanfiction[Theo doesn't have a boyfriend or a girlfriend, but it's Valentine's day and he's gonna have his chocolate.] "I want chocolate" Theo repeats, sprawled on Liam's bed with his phone in his hand. Liam can see the Instagram app opened. "It's Valentine's...
