A Collection of Madness

The Ward

I started to sweat, it didn't look good, I mean, she was watching me, so tensely, I could see those thick glasses behind that bookworm of a woman, she shrugged them to the back of her nose, and watched my face. She was always studying me, and she made no attempt to hide it. Why would she? Its her job after all. I took my time, let out a small breath. Then spoke.

"I'm fine, theres nothing wrong with me."

She tilted her head to the side as she did whenever something of grave importance would hit her in her dumb face.

"Blake are you denying your... condition?" She wore a grave face now, not that her face ever changed much, but this one was graver than usual.

I wanted to roll my eyes at her. But I simply let out a polite smile.

"Of course not doc, I know I'm a schizophrenic-"

"Paranoid Schizophrenic" She said as though that would mend our nonexistent relation.

"Right..."

Noticing my aversion at the moment, she leaned in.

'Excuse me, please go on" she almost commanded her hands in my direction.

"Look I'm doing a lot better I don't got the voices anymore, and those ones I do get once in a while I tell them to fuck off."

'Well I think thats just great' She tried to smile, and I mean she tried to smile. It was pitiful, it was a sad, it was awkward. I couldn't decide whether to cry or laugh.

"Thats it, "thats just great?" When can I get out of here?"

She leaned back, her smile fading, and her concerned face returned.

"I don't think you're ready just yet"

I clenched my knuckles so hard. I hated her, But I wasn't going to let her get to me. I needed to get out, and fast. This place, these people, they're all a lot more screwed up than me and I just wanted to get the fuck out.

"Look you said it yourself, you thinks its GREAT that I'm improving so why can't I get OUT of here" I took a deep breath.

"I don't think we should be discussing this, maybe next month we can take a look"

Even though I was never here because of violent reasons. I can't show the same mood I had when I got here. These fuckers expect you to be happy and smiling whilst in here. But I didn't care my limit had been reached and she was going to get everything.

"A month, One fucking month"

Her shoulders rose "Hey! I will not tolerate that kind of talk, maybe you should have some PN"

She was referring to pro necessitate, which basically meant "If necessary" referring to medication of course.

"I don't want no goddamn PN! I've been locked up here for months and this is what I get? "We'll discuss this next month" I shook my head sarcastically.

"I was not going to take it that far if I where you"

My eyes almost sneered shut, like a predator when its cornered.

"Or what, you'll keep me in here? Like a caged dog??"

She opened her mouth, I could see her teeth, then lifted a finger as to speak, but she paused.

"You're a screwer doc, and I'm riding the screw train, first class all the way to the RapyMacButtVille"

Then she smiled, it was calm and precise and it was everything she really was.

"Another month it is, I'm afraid that we couldn't account for your safety if you left. So you'll have to wait

Then the door opened, I recognized him immediately. A 90s middle parting and horn glasses on his face. He was a psychiatrist, and of all the people here he scared me the most.