i just need enough of you to dull the pain ; ym | tk

3.

It's quiet in the tattoo parlor. Too quiet for Yoongi's liking. The last costumer has left a few minutes ago and Yoongi's shift is about to end. Now it's just him and Namjoon.

Yoongi sighs as he throws another glance at the clock. Still five minutes – maybe he could start packing his stuff.
He tabs his fingers against the surface of the counter as he walks past it, just to destroy the silence that is slowly becoming unbearable.
He has never been one to mind the quiet a lot, in fact, it has always been quite the opposite. He prefers it since it allows him to fully concentrate on himself, on his thoughts and what he is doing.
But recently, silence has been too loud.
It is a reminder that something is missing. Someone.

Minho, who is lying on the couch, purrs and lifts his head when he notices that Yoongi steps closer. He gets up, stretches, and looks at him expectantly.
A smile tugs at the corner of Yoongi's lips.

"Hey, do you know how... long this has been in the fridge?"

Yoongi turns around to face Namjoon who is leaning against the doorframe, scratching his head and holding a rice milk carton in his hand.
"I just found it and I don't remember buying it... it must've been in there for months."

Yoongi doesn't say anything as he skeptically watches Namjoon. It is nothing new for him to be out of it, and usually, it is something that never ceases to amuse Yoongi.
But now, he can't bring himself to chuckle or even smile. He just stares at Namjoon, blankly, and wonders about the absurdity of the situation, especially when Namjoon finally looks back at him and seems even more confused than before.

"What?" he asks.

"What?" Yoongi asks back and shakes his head slightly.

"Is this Jeongguk's?"

Yoongi pulls a face and shrugs. "How am I supposed to know? I don't give a shit."

He turns away and grabs a pen, then pretends to write something down. It is quiet behind him. Namjoon doesn't move.
Yoongi squeezes his eyes shut and sighs.

"Sorry," he mumbles, turning around to face his friend, "I don't... know whose milk that is. It's not mine." He forces a smile to top it off.
Namjoon's look is piercing and sceptical and Yoongi avoids his eyes, then flinches and turns back around to hide his tentativeness.
He is sure that is has worked when he can hear Namjoon walk away, probably to dispose of the rice milk.
And Yoongi, Yoongi allows himself to relax for a second. Not much has changed but everything has gotten so much more exhausting. What he has been doing for years suddenly feels like a burden, and more often than not Yoongi finds himself lying in bed at home not being able to get up, let alone go to work.
He hasn't dared to call in sick yet, but maybe it's just a matter of time.

Sometimes, Yoongi draws, but even his drawings feel incomplete.

"Hey," he hears and winces a bit. Namjoon is right next to him and puts a hand on Yoongi's shoulder.
Yoongi glances at him.
"You can go home; your shift has ended. I'll tidy everything up."
Yoongi looks at the clock. Indeed, his shift is over.
"I can help you clean up, it's no problem," Yoongi says after remembering that there is nothing waiting for him at home. So why hurry?

"You look tired," Namjoon states. His eyes soften a bit.
"And? It's late, and you don't look exactly rested as well."
"That's not what I mean, Yoongi."

And Yoongi knows that. He's not stupid; but he doesn't want to talk to Namjoon about his problems, he can't, and he wonders why his friend can't accept that.

"Yoongi," Namjoon repeats. Yoongi figures he looks like he's thinking too much again.
"I can help you tidy up, it's no bother," he just says because he doesn't want to listen to Namjoon.
He is not ready for someone else to make him feel like shit, too. In fact, Yoongi himself is already doing a great job at that.