ᎬᏢᎻᎬᎷᎬᎡᎪᏞ ( pjm ♡ jjk )

i

"j-jungkookie?"

i whirled around, face visibly paling.

"j-jimin?!"

dear jimin,

i remember everything about that day.

the sound the duffel bag you were holding made when it fell from your hand, hitting the ground with a soft thump.

the tears that prickled in the corner of your eyes.

the disgusting smell of her cheap perfume.

a strangled noise escaped your mouth, and i felt as if hundreds of knives were slicing at me when i realized that i had hurt you.

"tell me this is a misunderstanding," you had breathed, voice shaking.

i desperately wanted to lie.

but i couldn't.

two hundred and fourteen days.

for two hundred and fourteen days, she had been chasing after me.

for two hundred and fourteen days, i resisted her, because i had you.

but on the two hundred and fifteenth day, when you were still on your way home from your dance competition, my body and mind were weary. i failed an exam and took out my frustrations at the gym. my walls were broken, and i couldn't push her away.

"i'm sorry."

it hurt me to watch you fight your tears back.

it hurt me even more to watch you pick your bag up and then turn away from me.

but it hurt me the most when you opened that door and never came back through.

i shouldn't be feeling sorry for myself.

it's all my fault.

people as beautiful as you are hard to find, and that day, i made an angel cry.

it's only been a week since that day, yet i already miss you.

some of our friends aren't talking to me.

only namjoon-hyung and yoongi-hyung have been with me.

i explained everything to them, i desperately wish i could explain to you.

but i don't deserve a chance to.

i talked to the headmaster yesterday and arranged to study abroad for a year in america, starting in march.

i can't stand staying here, knowing that i hurt you.

i won't ask for your forgiveness. i don't deserve it.

but from the bottom of my heart,

i'm sorry.

love,
jeon jungkook