Thoughts of loving someone

Confession Booth

What am I going to do? How can I tell him? How can I tell him for what I trully feel? Gosh I don't know what to do. Yeah that's me when I was in highschool I had this huge crush on Lake Healy, the school's famous hearthrob and eventually I had a crush on him since we were in grade school, and I still remembered what happened when I confessed my true feelings to him and it turned out worse I was humilated in front of everybody and from that day on I swore that I would never ever confess my true feelings towards a guy. When I was in college ok I was safe because I didn't have a crush on a single guy even now well... Almost. After I graduated in college my bestfriend  Jazz Plimpton recommended me in his workplace as an executive assistant to his big boss Mr. Vernon Godwin the CEO of Godwin Enterprises and Casino, Resorts and Hotel. I know it was a big break for me because the salary is a high jack so I decided to take the opportunity. Years passed and my work was stable I was able to sustain my own needs and my family's except for my feelings with my bestfriend Jazz. Eventually Jazz confessed that he loved me more than as a friend when we were in our freshmen in college but I told him that I was confused and give me time to think about it. It's already been 3 years after the confession  but he was still waiting for my answer then 2 years before he  eventually stopped waiting for my answer he grew tired and he gave up on me. That was my mistake because when I was ready to tell him of how I feel he gave up. After 1 year February came and inside the office they made a booth, The Confession booth and inside was Jazz blindfolded so he would not see whose telling her confession towards him, there is also a mike for the girl to lip sync her voice in order the guy who is blindfolded won't recognize her voice. I was the first one to try the confession and I felt very nervous when the microphone was in front of me and my coworkers urge me to start. I can't help that as I look at him, I lost the guy I love. I lost my bestfriend. I silently wiped my tears and cleared my throat. I didn't plan anything I want to say but this all came from the heart. I took a deep breath and said

"Jazz..." I began still getting used to my lip sync voice, I sighed and began again.

"Jazz... I knew that you were there for me for the past 4 no not 4 but 5 years...and I'm grateful that you were my friend...." I wipe another tear from my eye and continued my confession.

"Jazz... I'm sorry... I'm so sorry... I didn't tell you sooner.... I was afraid that if I confessed to you for what I trully feel you would reject me, worse laugh at me.... I was so afraid that it turned into one of my fears... But soon  as I realized what I really feel towards you another fear added to my list....... You didn't wait for me and it was all my fault.... I pushed you away and you were my fear Jazz.... You are both my fear and safe haven.... If I have realized it sooner this wouldn't happen.... Now look at you.... You belong to someone else now and not to me.... I'm happy for you Jazz and yes I'm willing to attend to your wedding..... But for one last time..... I---I---.... I love you Jazz..... Remember that....." after I confessed, I stood up and ran fast as my legs would take me away from everything.

2 years passed after that incident Jazz was finally married to his 2 year girlfriend George Sanders one of our officemates. I was happy for the both of them, they deserve each other but I can't promise to the bride that I won't stop loving her groom. I made a mistake again and that was confessing my love for the guy I love since college 20 minutes after he proposed to his girlfriend.