Ever since I lost the weight. Got to a place where I supposed to be perfect my life has turned upside down. I was happy when I was "fat" becuase I didn't care. Now I have expectations. People compliment me, and I'm scared. I'm so scared of gaining it back. I don't want to be ugly again. I don't want to hate myself.
I used to be a size 18, I had two friends and no instagram becuase I knew people wouldn't want to look at me. Now I'm a 4, I'm popular and I have a quarter million people who scroll through my feed everyday. Most people would think that my life is perfect.
I starved myself today. I saw that I only had a couple of points left on Weight Watchers and I was hungry. But I didn't eat. I let myself feel the emptiness.
"If I am not empty I am not beautiful."
That is what I told myself, and I felt good. I look good. People complimented me. Every time I would lose a pound my parents would tell how proud they were. And I was happy too. But I'm scared. I'm nervous of getting an eating disorder so I eat. But I'm scared of gaining he weight so I don't eat.
All of my friends eat like shit. 3,000 plus calories a day and they lose weight. I feel like I eat one apple and gain a pound.
YOU ARE READING
Book starters
Short StoryIn this book every chapter will have a different starter that any one can take. The starters are anywhere from one sentence to a paragraph and can be use to start a book or chapter. Remember anyone can take them but you must tag me @caro_goodfriend
