𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐇𝐈𝐃𝐃𝐄𝐍 𝐏𝐒𝐘𝐂𝐇𝐎𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐇 ━━ 𝐉𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐘

sixteen

j a c k

☁︎

it's been a day and i haven't come out of my room. corbyn has either come in to give me food or check on me. i think he's really concerned because he checks on me consistently. probably because of the insistent that happened before.

he doesn't want a repeat of that, nobody does. i haven't eaten the food corbyn brings me. there's no point. i'm probably going to die here eventually, so why not make it less painful.

i haven't even seen zach yet. christina has come in and talked to me but not zach. i don't even want to see or talk to him, not after what happened. to be honest i'm really scared to see him.

he seemed so furious to the point where he could actually hurt me or someone else. i've never seen him like that, that side of him scares me.

i stare directly into the blue wall while laying on my right side on the bed. this room reminds me of my room back at home. the same blue colors as my room.

the bed covers look very similar and the walls are almost spot on. i feel absolutely awful. i just want to die. i can't hurt myself because jonah took away all of my blades and anything sharp that i could use.

i've never felt this broken before. sure i was sad and said that i wanted to die back at home, but i actually wanted to live. now that i'm here in this cellar, taken here by my own will, and probably never going to get out, that's when i really want to be dead.

there's nothing to live for. my family and friends are gone, i'm stuck down here with a mad man, and i can't be with daniel.

daniel was the one who made happy. he made me smile even in the lowest of times. he was always by my side throughout everything. now that i don't have him i'm lost.

he was the one that was holding me together, keeping me from falling apart into millions of tiny pieces. he can't do that if i'm trapped down here. i'm falling apart, and this time daniel isn't here to save me.

i can't hold his hand, be held in his arms, or kiss his soft and warm lips. when our lips connected it was like magic. sparks flew and passion was present, it was an amazing feeling that i thought nobody could top. but then zachary dean herron came around.

when i first met zach i fell in love at first sight. his chocolate brown eyes glimmered in the bright light that shown on him. i fell for those eyes as soon as i laid my eyes on them.

our first kiss was absolutely amazing. i hate to say this but it was better than daniel could ever do. his lips were ever softer and warmer than daniel's. i could get lost in his brown eyes forever.

daniels eyes are very pretty but could never match the beauty of zach's. am i falling for zach? no, i can't be. i'm in love with daniel, right? what if i am? what if zach's not falling for me? he could never love me, what am i thinking.

my hands tremble to my mouth to cover the cries that are escaping from it. the bandages that are securely wrapped around my hands are starting to wearing out and get dirty.

my hands won't stop shaking. it's like someone else is moving them, i have no control over it. i slowly move my right hand to my left hand. in a quick motion i tear off the bandage, taking some of my skin with it.

while crying out in pain, i sit up and shake my hand around in the air, hoping it will help with the pain. i remove the other bandage as well, leaving my with two aching hands. i cry out in pain, way louder than last time.

getting out of the bed i make sure not to touch and thing with my hands. i run to the bathroom sink and let the cold water run over my hands. my cries grow louder as the dead skin starts to fall off of my hand.

the door opens, standing there is a worried corbyn. he runs over to me and examines my hands. "i'll get the first aid kit" corbyn says, running out of the room.

the reason the first aid kit is not in my room is because of what happened last time. jonah doesn't want it to happen again so he had corbyn remove it from my room.

corbyn rubs into the room with the first aid kit. he turns off the water and guides me towards the toilet. i sit down and he examines my hands more. "only your skin is peeling off, nothing big"

corbyn says opening the first aid kit. he takes an alcohol wipe and wipes my hands down. it stings a lot, making tears fall down my cheeks. he wraps both of my hands up again, making sure to be careful of my skin.

he walks me back out to my bedroom. "lay down and rest, yours hands will need sometime to heal" he says taking the untouched plate of food out to the kitchen, closing the door behind him.

i get into bed and close my eyes, trying to forget everything that's happening and escaping this world by falling asleep. my eyes get heavy and they close, blackness clouding my vision.

"jack?" a soft voice says. i open my eyes and look up to see zach standing at the door. "can i talk to you for a moment?" he asks, still using a soft voice. i nod my head in approval.

he walks in and sits right next to me on the bed. "i'm sorry jack, that out burst was totally unnecessary. i was just mad that you had a boyfriend because i'm in love with you" zach cries, tears falling down his face. i stay silent, i don't know what to say.

"please forgive me jack, i'm really sorry" zach pleads. i stay silent, i want to speak but for some reason my mouth isn't moving.

"oh come on jack, please say something" he cries even more. i lean in quickly and connect our lips. he is surprised at first, then kisses back.

i didn't know what to say and this was the way i was telling him that i forgive him. i don't know why i picked to kiss him, it was just in the moment i guess. the kiss turns into a make out session, lasting about 1 minute.

the door swings open to reveal a very angry jonah. "what the hell do you think you're doing?!?!" he shouts in our faces. i stay still, too scared too move an inch, so does zach.

"i'll teach you a lesson" jonah yells picking me up by my shirt and walking out of the room. my feet are dragging on the floor and my sweatshirt collar is chocking me. zach follows us out shouting at jonah. he pulls me all the way to the entrance of the red doors.

"no! master, please take me instead!" zach cries out holding onto jonah shirt. he gets pushed off to the floor and i get dragged into the room. zach gets up and tries to get in but jonah closes the door a split second before he can. you can hear zach still banging on the door but soon gets silent when jonah drags me down a dark hallway. i'm going to die, i just know it.

—
wednesday
september 12th, 2018
1286 words

edited on;
september 5th, 2019
1300 words

-alayna ☁︎