Confessions of A Teen Mom

Chapter 9

After the events at school last week I've officially, unofficially decided I'm never going back. Oh how I wish it was that easy. My parents keep telling me to suck it up because I'll have to deal with it more and more as I get bigger. Way to make a girl feel better. Anyways besides that things have been alright. I made up with Gem so we're cool again. And Ben has surprisingly been there for me. He brings me snacks, picks up my lunch, helps me with my homework - I actually help him more than he helps me- and walks me to class.

It hasn't been easy though. As I get a little bigger the stares and whispers increase. At fifteen weeks my tummy isn't too big but it's noticeable. I hear some nasty rumors about me from time to time, and they hurt but for the most part I ignore them.  Ben and I are walking to the class that we share when the same blonde from the party steps in front of us. 

The girl shoots me a glare - why, I don't know- and smiles at Ben. "Hi Ben." she says in a sickly sweet voice. I roll my eyes. Ben looks her up and down clearly annoyed. "Shelby." he nods and then walks around her. Ben grabs my arm gently and pulls me along. "Man just seeing that girl annoys me. She's really weird. She's been stalking me for days. Standing by my car after school, watching me during practice, staring at me during lunch, and even showing up to my clas-" my laugh cuts him off.

"What's so funny?" he mutters clearly not amused. I laugh harder. "This. This is what's funny. It's karma." I laugh again and shake my head. Ben smirks and rolls his eyes. "Maybe so, but that doesn't make it any less weird or annoying. I'm seriously thinking of taking out a restraining order on her." he huffs out some air. I smirk holding in another laugh. It's what he gets for cheating, doesn't matter how "accidental" it was.  

"What do you have planned later?" I ask Ben. He looks down at me. "Nothing, why?"he asks. "I wanna go to the movies. Tori is going out of town today and Jemma is hanging out with her boyfriend again." I scrunch up my nose. Ben laughs, "I would go with you but I have to drive my mom to chemo today." he says. "Well I don't mind coming. If you don't mind that is." I say. 

Ben ponders the offer for a moment before nodding. "Yeah that'll be nice. My mom had such a good time when you came shopping with us. She's been bugging me to invite you over for dinner, so I know she'll be happy with this." he nods. Now I know what ya'll are thinking. I'd be thinking the same thing too if I were you. But Ben apologized, and he explained what happened. I'm not saying we're going to get back together -yet- but we can at least be friends considering we're about to have a child together. Right? 

After school I head back home to change into some more comfortable clothes. I walk downstairs after changing and go into the kitchen. "I'm home!"I announce grabbing the notepad on the counter. I write out a brief note to let my parents know where I'll be. Ben calls me. "Hey, we're on the way to get you now. Bring snacks."he says. "Alright I'll see you when you get here." I hang up and grab a small backpack by the door. I fill it with random snacks and put on my shoes. 

I start to head outside after the doorbell rings when I feel an urge to throw up. I run to the bathroom quickly and throw up into the toilet. "Morning sickness? More like all the time sickness." I mutter washing my hands. I brush my teeth quickly and open the front door. Ben turns to me. "I thought you had changed your mind." he smiles a little. I shake my head. "Nope, just a little pregnancy sickness. I got the snacks." I hold up the bag. 

Ben smiles "Good we're going to need them. Mom gets pretty hungry after her chemo session and it'll be boring while we're there." he says. He grabs the bag in one hand and then my hand. I shut and lock the door behind me. I look down at our entwined hands and smile softly. Don't judge me. Ben and I were a great couple before the incident.  

I still love him. I don't believe in that "being to young to know what love is" crap. I know that I loved Ben and still  do. I'm fine with just being friends for now though. Even though I've forgiven him, my trust is still broken but he's earning it back little by little. We walk over to his car and I get in the back sick. "Hi Liz" I pat her shoulder. "Hi Pepper." she says softly. "How have you been?' I ask. Olivia sighs, "I've seen better days." she says. I'm not sure what to say to that so I just pat her shoulder again. 

"How's your mom?" Olivia asks me. "She's pretty good. You should stop by and see her sometimes. She'd love to have you."I say. Olivia smiles. "Maybe I will. And you?" she turns to look at me. "How are you doing? And the baby?"she glances down at my tummy. I smile. "We're both doing doing good. We got to hear the baby's heartbeat. Do you want to hear?" I ask pulling out my phone. Olivia nods eagerly. I smile and pull up the audio of it. I press play and the heartbeat fills the car. 

Olivia's eyes water.  "That's just wonderful." she smiles. I glance at Ben and see him smiling. "I had a picture of the ultrasound too." I show her my phone. "Aw! Look at that, that's just precious. Will you send me those?" she asks. I nod and send her the video and picture. "Now you can look at them at any time." I say. 

We arrive at the chemotherapy treatment center and get out of the car. I look up at the building and loop my arm through Olivia's. Olivia smiles and pats my hand gently. I look back to see Ben grabbing the bag full of snacks out of the car. He smiles when he meets my eyes and walks over to us. "You ready ma?" he asks. Olivia nods and starts walking. I follow behind her looking around.  

We all go inside the building. I take a seat in the waiting room while Ben signs his mother in and escorts her to the back. Ben returns after a few minutes and takes a seat beside me. "How are you feeling?"he asks. "I feel alright Ben. You don't have to keep asking." I say. Ben smiles sheepishly, "Sorry." he says. I shake my head. "It's okay. It's nice knowing that you care." I say. 

Ben nods and unzips the backpack. "What all did you-oooh Oreos!" Ben grins. I roll my eyes and laugh. He doesn't need to know I packed them specifically for him. Don't look at me like that. I know exactly what you're thinking. Stop thinking it, we talked about this. I watch as Ben stuffs an Oreo in his mouth grinning like a fool. I smile and shake my head. "How long does her treatment usually take?" I ask. "It varies. Some days it only takes a hour or two. Other days it make take up to four hours." Ben says. 

I nod. "Is Olivia usually tired after?" I ask. Ben nods. "Tired, cranky, and hungry." he says. I nod again and pull out my phone. I jump when I feel something move in my stomach. "What's wrong?" Ben looks at me concerned. "I think the baby just kicked. Here feel."I grab his hand and put it on my stomach as the baby kicks again. Ben's eyes widen. "How many weeks are you again?" he asks. "This week makes me.... twenty weeks. That remind me, we're going to find out the gender next week. I want you there." I say 

Ben nods. "Of course I'll be there." he says. I laugh at Ben's face when the baby kicks again. "It feels strange right?" I say. Ben nods grinning. I watch in shock as Ben leans in to kiss me. I move back slightly. Ben moves back and looks down at his shoes. "Sorry..um...sorry."he mutters. I shake my head. "It's okay. I-I'm just not ready. Maybe I will be soon."I say. Ben glances at me. "Really?" he asks. I nod. 

I want to take it slow. Moving fast is what got us in the predicament in the first place.