imagines | e.d

fucked up

i laughed lightly as i texted my best friend, ethan.

e: dude

y/n: huh?

e: i hella slid on this girl

e: damn

i felt my heart crack a little when he said that.

y/n: ohp

y/n: what happened??

e: so this girl slides up on my story right?

e: and she says "bet"

e: and i go "fr hmu tho"

e: and i slipped her my number

e: and she said "for me or someone else"

e: and i replied "u ur the one that slid up"

e: and she sent the drooly face emoji

e: so we just gonna see where shit goes from there

y/n: damnnn get it e

i feel my heart start racing at the thought of my childhood crush finding yet another girlfriend.

y/n: just promise me you won't forget about me and stop texting me when you get the girl

e: y/n

e: you know i'm not like that

e: i would never do that to you

y/n: ya i know

y/n: it's just...

y/n: all of my old guy friends stopped hanging out with me and texting me as soon as they got girlfriends bc they didn't want them getting jealous

e: that's hella fucked up

e: but that's not how it works

e: i'm not leaving you even if i wanted to

e: you and y/f/n would kick my ass

y/n: haha very true

my body shakes with anxiety as tears fill my eyes.

i should've told him how i feel. then i wouldn't be having to hear about one of his girl escapades.

y/n: lmao thinking about all that shit is giving me major anxiety

e: no

e: don't do that

e: i'm not that type of guy

y/n: i know you aren't

y/n: but thinking about everything i went through is making me feel that pain again

e: i won't stop talking to you

i let out a huge breath of air as my brain sends itself into full panic mode.

y/n: i'm in my bathroom

y/n: i'm literally having a mental breakdown now

e: stop y/n

e: don't even think about any of that stuff

y/n: it's not that

i shake, tears falling freely down my face.

e: then what's wrong

i'm completely in love with you, but you can't know that.

y/n: life is too much

y/n: i'm so stressed

i plug in my earbuds, clicking on the acoustic version of boys like you by anna clendening.

tears continue to roll down my cheeks as my crying turns into full blown sobbing.

e: just breathe

e: calm down y/n

e: it's gonna be ok

y/n: i hope so

i lean my head back against the beige bathroom wall.

ethan texts me a few short responses, but i don't open them.

i can't breathe.

after about 10 minutes, i text him back.

y/n: i'm gonna go to sleep

e: ok gnnnnn feel better

y/n: goodnight ethan

i flop onto my bed, crying me eyes out and eventually falling asleep.

i should've just told him i like him.

ugh.

this based on a true story about something that happened between me and my guy best friend tonight

so ya... i'm heartbroken and he doesn't even know