Love Costs Tears

Dont Leave Me Baby

Devon

I had met Devon 3 years ago, during my senior year of high school. He was older than me by 4 years, which only lured me towards him even more. He was passionate about everything and so full of life and spunk.

He had been introduced to me through a mutual friend, and we hit it off almost instantly.

When I graduated he had officially asked me to be his girlfriend, we were dating before, but neither of us had tried to make it official.

I was happy with him, utterly and completely happy.

During our first month as a couple he had taken me ice skating. I was falling everywhere and at one point I was crying tears of frustration as he watched me fail. Noticing my distress, he came over to me with a small smile on his face.

"C'mon gorgeous, you can't shed tears over this." He picked me up and guided me over to the sitting area. I sighed, wiping the few tears that had escaped.

"I'm just frustrated. I feel stupid and I can't freaking do it without falling every damn 5 seconds." I pouted and looked down. I got frustrated easily, and when I didn't know how to do something, my frustration seemed to grow faster than usual.

"Hey now, it's okay if you fall. You've only been doing this a day. I'll tell you what, I'll bring you back here later and I'll teach you. But right now, let's get out of here." He smiled at me and started untying my skates. "We'll watch movies and cuddle. But no more tears alright? As long as I'm here you have nothing to cry about." I chuckled at him being slightly full of himself and nodded.

The rest of that day was a happy memory, filled with laughter and make out sessions, like any early couple would have.

As time past on, our bond to each other grew, strengthening with every fight and argument we managed to surpass. There was one argument that I would never forget.

It was late at night and he had been out with his buddies. That normally didn't bother me but on this particular day it did. It was our 2 year anniversary and he hadn't been home the entire day. I was pissed to say the least.

As soon as he got home we were at each others neck, throwing venomous words at each other. But one thing he said cut me deeper than the rest.

"Why is it even that big of a deal? It's not like we're gonna be together for much longer anyways!" As soon as I registered what he'd said, all my anger was replaced with sadness. If he didn't think we we're going to last, why was he with me? I didn't stand there for long, I didn't want to let him see he had made me cry.

I ran past him and outside, I wasn't wearing shoes and I looked like a mess, but I couldn't have cared less at that time. I was hurt. Deeply hurt. I began to sob and sat on the sidewalk, and wrapped my arms around myself.

I wanted quiet time so I could prepare myself for the inevitable. I was expecting a break up, I was expecting him to pack my things and send me off, but instead he came outside and wrapped himself around me.

"Baby, I'm sorry. You know I say things I don't mean when I'm mad, it's even worse since I'm not exactly sober right now. I love you and I want to be with you for a long time. I want to see you with my ring on your finger, and I wanna see you walk down the isle with a white dress on, I want to feel your stomach when our child is growing, I wanna be able to raise it with you. Fucking hell, I wanna give you everything _______, but I'm a fuck up and I'm sorry. Baby please come back inside."

After his apology and confession, we headed back inside and sorted out our problems. He ended up making up our anniversary the weekend after, and it was better than I ever could have hoped for.

And now we were here. In a devastating change of fate, I was diagnosed with terminal bone cancer. The doctor said I had about 4 months to live. With little time left we did as much as we could together. We went to water parks, stayed up all night and watched the stars, wrote each other love letters to keep each other in mind when we were apart due to my check ups. We even volunteered our time at orphanages, spending time with children who didn't have much going for them yet.

3 weeks before I was scheduled to pass, Devon took me back to the ice skating rink. When we pulled up I laughed. I was in no shape to ice skate and he knew it.

"What are we doing here Dev, you know I can't do this." I giggled at him

"I know, but I thought it'd be nice to reminisce in the past." I shook my head at him but made no protest as we got out of the car and interlocked our hands, walking towards the building we had so long ago been to before .

The place was empty and the soft sound of music was barely audible. I could see an archway of flowers in the center of the room with a lone man stading in the middle of it.

"Devon, what's with the archway?" I asked confused, he didn't answer, but I felt his hand slip from mine.

I tore my gaze away from it and look over at him, only to find him kneeling in the floor.

"Devon.....what are you doing?" I could feel my eyes water and I began to shake as he brought out a small dark blue box.

He popped it open and I could see an elegant diamond ring inside.

I was breathing heavily as he began to speek.

"I know you don't have much time left, and I know that if I don't marry you while I have the chance I'll regret it the rest of my life. I love you _______. And I meant it when I told you I wanted a life with you, no matter how short it may be. _______, Will you marry me?" I looked at him, tears falling from my face with a shaky hand over my lips to stop from sobbing. I knew that if I chose to speak I would have never stopped crying, so I nodded my agreement. After he slipped the ring on my finger and stood back up, I embraced him and kissed him with all the passion I had seen in him when I first met him.

As it turns out the archway of flowers was for us, and the lone man was a pastor, ready to marry us as soon as I had said yes.

The ceremony was quite and I could hear the sound of Jacks mannequin paying in the background.

When he dipped to kiss me, I could feel myself getting lighter.

My hands framed his face as I locked eyes with him and gave him a lazy smile.

"Thank you for this Devon, you have no idea how much I love you. Promise me you'll move on after me. I want you to be happy, even if I'm not the one to do it anymore." He started to blur, but his words were still clear.

"Don't talk like that _______, we still have a little time left. But I promise that I will. I'll never stop loving you though, not ever." he kissed me again and I could feel myself swaying. After our lips parted I found it harder to keep my eyes open.

"Devon, I don't think I'm gonna be here for much longer." His eyes widened and through my blurred eyes I could see his eyes already letting tears through.

"No, no, no! You have 3 more weeks! Please _______, don't do this to me! Not now! Oh god, please not now!" I felt every tear hit me at an agonizing unsteady pace.

"Devon...please don't remember today like this. I'll always be your wife." things were slowly slipping into darkness.

"Please give me five more minutes! Baby please....you can't go... I love you so much. " I managed a small smile before everything disappeared into black.

TEARS I AM IN TEARS AT THIS 😭😭😭