Ⓡⓐⓝⓓⓞⓜ ⓑⓞⓞⓚ

The girl I need to be mocks me. 

She laughs at me, glares at me, ignores me.

I feel cornered, I'm being forced into a society that wants to kill me.

The girl I am expected to be looks down at me and pities me.  She makes me want to kill me. She makes me want to kill MY OWN happiness. 

I am useless. I am stupid. I am ugly. I will never be good enough. I will always be alone.

I actually thought I was okay or I would be okay soon. I just want to vent but I really don't want to approach people and I don't want people to worry for me and I just feel terrible, so I won't talk. I'll bottle it up again.

I'm sorry, I'm just being edgy. I will say, I'm not joking when I say I hate myself and want to die.