Emilygleam somehow gets past all of the awake cats in ThunderClan to see Shadestripe, a ShadowClan cat she met on a cat dating website because all she-cats need mates.
Emilygleam goes to someplace at the ShadowClan border and meets Shadestripe which has to have a name associated with shadows because ShadowClan!
They stare at each other. For hours.
"Clanmate x Clanmate ships are weird," says Shadestripe after 4 hours of staring.
"Yeah Clanmate x Clanmate is sOOOOOO overrated, forbidden love is so much better," says Emilygleam, who apparently didn't read a few of the books.
Five hours later, they decide to go back to their own territory. Emilygleam goes back and catches extraterrestrial prey at an unknown place, and somehow is doing everything perfectly even though she didn't sleep at all.
At the end of the day Emilygleam catches 5093452452 squirrels, 49385943680 mice, and 3405537043527 pterodactyls, and 23455 aliens. Yes, actual aliens. From different planets. That one cat alone probably can't fight or kill.
"Wow. I sure am glad I went to Mars today!" says Emilygleam.
"hey, how come all of our food is extraterrestrial now?" asks some background character.
"Shhhh just dont question it!" silences another background character.
"Oh, okay."
"Okay."
"When did pterodactyls become not extinct?" asks Leafleaf.
"SHHHH JUST DON'T QUESTION IT!"
Emilygleam starts heading to her nest, but then... She realizes something!
Emilygleam gasps, "I HAVE TO SEE MY SHADOWCLAN BOYFRIEND TONIGHT!"
"Jeez, calm down." a background character comments.
Emilygleam trots out of the den and somehow isn't noticed by the other awake warriors in the den, and makes her way outside ThunderClan even though half the clan is awake.
But then, suddenly, a cat, Jumpleap, jumps in front of her inconveniently.
"NO LEAVING THE CAMP UNLESS I LET U"
"Why...?"
"CUZ I SAY SO"
"But now what will Kayla do for the plot?"
"That's her problem."
"well okay. I'll just go catch some triceratops now."
"When did those come back to life?"
"Today."
"Emilygleam, things can't rise from the dea---"
"LOOK AT OUR FRESH-KILL PILE!!!"
"Its a bunch of aliens that cats don't know about---how do we even know what alien means???"
"We just do."
"Why is our prey a bunch of dead zombie dinosaurs and aliens?"
"It just is. Can I go now its getting late."
"NO."
They argue for hours until dawn.
"oh its dawn...." says Emilygleam.
"Welp."
YOU ARE READING
Adventures of Emilygleam
Humorso I was bored and I was like "Why not write a warriors fanfic? because of my everlasting unhealthy obsession with the books I must write one right now--" so I wrote this and made it overexaggerated just for fun.
