𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬, boris pavlikovsky

seven, midnight confessions

vii. chapter seven
midnight confession

"boris."

the boy turned to face y/n. he was already tipsy from the alcohol he was still holding in his right hand, but he immediately recognised her. he just knew it was her.

there was something about her. he couldn't understand what that was.
something connected them. something made him want to hold her, tell everything was okay even though she didn't need it. y/n was a strong woman, and strong women don't need a man. strong women need love, just like the manliest men do.

but boris didn't know how to love properly, he wasn't used to it, and y/n knew. she knew because she was just like him.

that's the thing, they were two selfish teenagers who didn't know how to hold each other's heart without the fear of dropping it to the ground and break it into million pieces.

"y/n." he spoke quietly, the cool air killing the effect on the alcohol on him.

he felt y/n's warmth as she sat beside him, sighing quietly. both of them were wrapped into an uncomfortable silence. too many questions, but not enough courage to actually ask.

"do you know what hurts most about being selfish?" y/n suddenly asked, boris turning to face her. her h/c hair glimmered under the moonlight, and boris thought he could see his whole world into her e/c eyes.

however, boris shook his head. "what?"

"you create yourself a mask." y/n explained. "people get used to the selfish you. and then, you end up convincing yourself you don't care about anyone, not anymore. but they leave, and you feel pain stabbing through your heart. but people can't see you being weak, so you put on that mask again, and let youself die behind it."

boris listened to every word escaping her lips, feeling the sadness filling her voice.

he nodded. "i want to kiss you."

he heard y/n's little chuckle and scoff, and felt her head on his shoulder. her h/c hair tickled his neck, still stained with the lovebites she had left on his pale skin.

"i know." she said. "i want to kiss you too."

boris stared at the almost full moon above them, praying whoever or whatever was in heaven to please make this story have a happy end.

no one moved.

"i don't know my real last name." y/n confessed. "i grew up as an orphan, i never got to know my parents. then, i met leo. he was so sweet with me. he helped me. he found a new name for me, and i fell for him."

her voice cracked every now and then, hot and salty tears streaming down her face. boris wrapped his left arm around her, tossing away the bottle he was holding. he kissed her head, breathing in the scent of her hair.

"he died, Boris." she kept on crying. "he fucking died. he left me. i was just a kid. fuck, i still am a kid!"

"is okay." boris said, but both of them knew he was lying. he kissed her head again.

"i can't be loved." she was shaking now, goosebumps on her (skin colour) skin. "i destroy people. it's like I can't help myself."

"you're loved." boris replied, running his long fingers through her hair. "te amo."

her whole world shattered down as he spoke those two words she had taught him months back.

"ya tozhe tebya lyublyu." she answered quietly, letting a weak smile curve her lips as he wiped the tears off her face.

"you pretty when you cry," he said, kissing each of her closed eyelids. "but you prettier when you happy. you're beautiful, y/n."

"do you still want to kiss me?" she asked shyly. she felt herself melt inside those dark eyes. her soul softening. her heart pounding so fast in her chest her brain was begging it to stop.

"yes."

"please do."

y/n watched boris lean in, and she did as well. his breath smelled like alcohol and cigarettes, but damn. she closed her eyes, and felt heaven brush against her lips.

her heart pounded so fast she thought it would've soon stopped. but it didn't.

now her heart was beating for boris pavlikovsky and she knew it.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★

this is my favourite
chapter so far