𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬, boris pavlikovsky

nine, please don't

ix. chapter nine
please don't

"shh, it's okay."

boris's voice felt warm on y/n's heart. she had been crying because of the pain that stabbed her entire body.

she was shaking, the sweat mixing with her tears as boris kept kissing her forehead, telling her fake promises.

"is okay, shh. everything is okay, you'll be fine. i love you, y/n." he spoke softly in her ear, kissing her temples. his eyes were watering too, but he managed to hide the pain. abstinence was such a bitch.

y/n's business had a major stop due to the police investigating on megan and a homeless' death, both overdosed on her heroin.

boris had convinced her to stop dealing for a bit, and found her a job as babysitter. he worked as waiter for a restaurant nearby y/n's house.

everything seemed better at the moment, they were hopeful about the future. boris would always remember when he and y/n threw all the heroin and acid she was hiding, and burned it all up.

the way she smiled at him, the way she kissed him, the way she一

"i can't, boris," she cried for the millionth time. his heart was aching, he hated to see her like this. he wiped her tears off her s/c cheeks. her tears were hot on the cold sweat that covered her face and neck.

"you're strong, my love." boris told her, kissing her lips sweetly. "we been sober for so long. we can't stop now."

"i don't want to lose you, boris." she cried.

boris sighed. "you won't."

"you've grown so much in the last few months." she said. "you're protecting me from everything. i thought i could control my life but i'm so fucking weak."

"what the fuck?" he snapped. his embrace tightened around her petite figure. "you are strong. i'm in pain, god only knows how much. fuck, you keep me sane."

"i don't,"

"you do!"

he kissed her again, stroking her cheek lovingly. her tears mized with his, but he didn't care.

he toyed with the hem of her shirt as she let out a moan一 he couldn't tell if it was because of him or out of pain.

"don't wanna hurt you." he whispered, kissing her cold, sweaty forehead.

"you never hurt me." she said, pulling him in another kiss.

her tongue traced along his bottom lip desperately, but boris broke the kiss.

"sex won't make you feel better" he told her. "we have to go to hospital."

"no, boris, please don't take me there" she pleaded, her e/c desperate eyes locking into his. "you know i hate hospitals. all those sick people, all that death. boris, please don't."

he nodded unsurely, a skeptical expression on his pale face.

he knew he was doing the wrong thing but he loved her so much he couldn't do anything she didn't want to do.

he loved her, she loved him. but they were way too fucked up.

"please don't." her broken voice reached his ears desperately. he wanted to close his eyes and cry but he wanted to be strong for her.

"cry, baby" she managed to say, her hand stroking his cheek. "it's okay to cry. it's not like i've never."

he closed his eyes shut.

"let go." she whispered, her voice so soft he barely heard her. "don't act strong for me, I know you are."

boris broke down, whimpering and shaking violently as he held her in his arms.

"i love you." he babbled.

"i love you so much." she said, keeping him close. "i love you, boris."

her hands ran through his dark curls as he tightened his grip around her waist.

they were in pain but at least they had each other.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★

sorry if this sucks but i've written this in a rush cos i had to go to my grandparents'