cupid's arrow » bill anderson | mamma mia

twenty three

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My childhood bedroom hadn't changed in the slightest. I still had the same uncomfortable single bed that I'd spent many tearful nights on. The posters were still up and the table utterly cluttered with things I didn't need but held on to for a perceived sentimental value. I was filled with nostalgia and all the dread I'd felt had disappeared, though Bill remained in the back of my mind. I couldn't quite get the image out of my head of his face, the frown that he'd tried to hard to hide. It was terrifyingly sincere.

Andrew and I spoke for some more time. We had a lot of catching up to do and I knew that, in my heart, I missed him. He was my big brother; how could I not miss him?

"Miss me?" Eleanor's little voice piped up. She was the youngest of us all and perhaps the most innocent. Her voice bordered on angelic and she shared many of our Mother's traits. Her hair was a wipsy, mousy brown that fell around her face softly. I, on the other hand, had our Father's red hair and unmissable pale skin.

I gave her a wide, happy, true smile. She was the cutest child and the most lovely friend.

"Not much." I responded, winking. She frowned at me unable to stop herself rolling her eyes in annoyance. "I missed you more than I can tell you." I admitted, pulling her into a tight embrace. Eleanor was a little taller than when I'd last seen her, just a few inches but they only made me realise just how much of the year I'd been gone.

I paused, allowing the rushed conversation between my two siblings to float over me. I was somewhat dazed by a question; to tell Eleanor of Bill. I trusted her and, unlike my other siblings, she wouldn't use it as leverage when she wanted something. I needed an honest opinion and I feared Mother's rage when she found out.

"I-"

I could barely make the word leave my mouth before I was cut off by Andrew's garbled speech. He'd never been one for waiting.

"Are you excited to see Jamie?" He asked, grinning. I paused, unsure of what to make of his question. Why he'd bring up Jamie, of all people, was of a wonder to me. He'd never cared for him before.

"As in Jamie?" I chuckled, feeling a tinge of nerves overcome me. He nodded and I shook my head, giving him a questionable glance.

"Why not?" A long frown pulled his expression down. My brother, though the eldest, was at times, the most stupid.

"Why would I want to see an ex boyfriend, Andrew?" I snarked, dismissing his clear inability to read between the lines. His expression betrayed him. His lips parted a little but no sound came out, making it clear what Andrew was going to say.

"We thought-"

"I assume this was Mother's doing." I interrupted, folding my arms. Eleanor nodded slowly, ready to bolt. As a child, even as a teenager, I'd had an uncontrollable temper. I'd learnt to keep it under wraps somewhat while I was in Greece, with Angelique's help, but the idea of Jamie made me feel sick with anger. I didn't wish to see a cheating scum who clearly cared more for my inheritance than for I.

"She thought you'd be happy." Eleanor murmured. "We thought you'd be happy."

I melted at her tone. I was unable to stay angry at Eleanor, no matter what had happened. I placed my hand on her shoulder and gave her a soft smile, shaking my head.

"It's not your fault. I promise."

Her eyes lit up as soon as I said it. "Promise?"

"Promise."

The news of Jamie's invitation for tonight had made the dread return. It was clear Mother invited him to discuss me, though she'd get a fine shock when she realised I'd come back a week earlier than she expected. Thankfully, I had Bill. I loved him and I missed him and by hell, I wished he was here.

The rest of the afternoon rushed over and soon enough, the sun had begin to set. I had missed an English sunset, in truth, setting just over the trees and allowing the darkness of the night to sooth over us. It was a dreamy view.

I'd greeted my Mother and Josie, my sister, on their return. The sheer look of shock on her face was indescribable and I found a great sense of pleasure in her shock. We weren't exactly on the best of terms.

"Nancy." Mother greeted me, smiling as I took my seat. I had placated myself opposite her and the brunette man who sat to her left, Jamie. He eyed me with a suspicion I'd never encountered before.

"How's your jaw?" I turned to Jamie, a small smirk tugging at my lips. Jamie glared at me and nodded, facading a smile.

"It's fine." He snapped, seething with me. Bill's fist making contact with that seditious man's jaw was the best thing my husband had ever done for me, albeit an ill-advised action.

"What happened to your jaw?" Josie's whiny voice piped up. As ever, she was a nosey cow with little regard for her own business.

"He walked into a lamppost when he tried to visit me in Greece, didn't you, Jamie?" I asked. His lack of response prompted an awkward silence across the table, my Mother shooting daggers at me. The sound of clinking cutlery filled the air and the tension served to push me further into my Mother's bad books. "It's a shame.. It was one handsome lamppost."

Jamie dropped his knife with a clang, landing on the plate loudly and prompting yet another glare from him. "Handsome." He scoffed to himself, not thinking highly of Bill.

"Nancy." Mother spoke sternly, placing her cutlery down delicately and straightening her back, looking at me. She was ready to spit her venom.

"Mother." I smirked smugly, eyeing her. "What is it?"

She let out a long sigh before nodding to Jamie. Mother spoke once more with a delicate tone. "I can't quite understand why you're treating your Fiancé like that."

I snorted in shock, my mouth gaping with the audacity. "Fiancé?" I scoffed. "Fiancé."

"Fiancé." Jamie repeated the word. I didn't know what he'd told them of his time in Greece but we obviously had different versions of events.

"Not a chance in hell." I snapped, standing up abruptly. "We're not engaged, Jamie. We can't be."

"Why not?" Andrew asked. He'd remained sitting but slowly rose. His girlfriend sat next to him with a look of surprise on her face. It was clear family dinners hadn't been very eventful in my absence.

"We just can't." I spoke a little softer, not wanting to tell them the truth. I didn't know if I had the energy to deal with a screaming match against my Mother.

"You said you'd marry him, Nancy." Mother's voice rose.

"No, I didn't." My voice rose to match hers. "I cannot and will not marry him."

"And why can't you? To show rebellion against your parents?" She snapped. "As if you haven't done that all your life."

"I can't have have Jamie as a husband, Mother." I replied to her in a solemn tone. She didn't quite share it.

"You can't just break your word!"

"I never said I would in the first place!" I yelled, glaring at him.

She paused, taking a breath. When Mother spoke again, her tone was eerily calm, though I knew layers and layers of hot anger was bubbling beneath, nearly at boiling point. "Why can't you take him as your husband?"

"Because I already have a husband." I breathed. "I.. I.. I already have a husband." I repeated. Their faces were all gawking at me, their mouths agape.

"You're married?! To who?!"