Be My Friend [Jookyun]

E

Dear Changkyun, 

Sorry, for being distant. 

But, I did arrive. 

Minhyuk have decided for all of us to hang out at the beach. 

At night.

It was weird, but it was interesting. 

I went, though. 

I didn't want to. 

It wasn't because of you...

I just wasn't feeling for it, but Kihyun pushed me in going, anyway. 

I am sorry for ignoring your messages. 

My feelings seem to make me ignorant, and I can not control them, anymore. 

But, I have rebuilt, and I hope I have enough strength to face this night. 

I will spend it with you. 

You hugged me when I arrived with Hyungwon, and you only hugged me. 

I was surprised, but I loved your warm arms, embracing me as though you haven't seen me for years. 

You seen me at school, I don't understand. 

We walked around the beach, we played around, and I forced myself to be active. 

Yes, I faked. 

I didn't want any of you guys worrying, again. 

We played a game, and we needed to be in teams. 

Since there was 7, only one will need to catch the teams. 

Kihyun was evil enough to make you and I as a team. 

I fucking hate his midget ass. 

But, we both ran. I felt like I was sinking when I ran in the sand, my feet heavily planted into the beach's snow. 

You laughed and turned towards me, when I almost fell since I lost balance. You held my hand, and led me across the sand. 

I felt my heart race, as your fingers lace with my own. Your hands were warm, and your hand fit perfectly with mine. 

You're making everything worse for me, Changkyun. 

We stopped while facing the ocean, you stared up at the night sky. The clouds revealed the stars, that night. 

"I missed you," you said while staring up at the stars. The beautiful astrology made me look away from you, your words drifting along the cold breeze.

"Why?" 

You shrugged and turned towards me, you smiled. 

You still held my hand. 

"Thank you." you said. 

I looked at you with confusion, then I looked back up at the astrology, again. 

You should thank the stars for being here, not me.

You squeezed my hand, and looked back up at the astrology with me. 

I realized, we were shadows within the night, and we were staring up at the sources of light throughout the darkness. 

The darkness I feared. 

The darkness you have gotten used to. 

"Thank you for being my friend," you said. 

I should of been grateful.

But, I only felt the pain within my chest, holding onto your hand tightly as tears welled up in my eyes. 

You must have been surprised, and you instantly looked at me as crystals fell from my eyes.

I am sorry, I wanted to say. 

Sincerely,
Honey