Songbird

11, in which Nate visits.

     There had been something in the words. Some sort of siren song that trapped me in my memories. I hadn't just seen them, it was like I was experiencing them all again.

     Slowly, I felt the darkness of the private quarters give way to a familiar comfort. I slowly woke, then pulled myself up from my bed. I was still in the clothes I wore to the studio. I pulled the scarf from my head, hoping the headache would fade soon once my hair settled, before I stumbled out of bed. I hit the light switch.

     It took me longer then I want to admit to get changed. I felt a rush of fatigue and hunger, but when I got to my kitchen, I found myself just staring at the stove. I wasn't sure I could do it tonight.

     Soft singing started outside. Quiet, like he wasn't sure if I was awake. It was a somber melody, caught somewhere between heartwarming and sorrowful. I tentatively opened a window, just a bit. Nate sat a bit away, eyes closed, lost in the words. I silently pushed a shutter out completely, letting myself relax in the dim light of the full room.

     Hold me, whatever lies beyond this morning is a little later on. Regardless of warnings, the future doesn't scare me at all. Nothing's like before...

     Nate seemed to relax as the last note faded to silenced. He opened his eyes to stare at the ceiling for a moment, before they came down to my home. He jolted a bit in surprise. I offered a small wave. We did little more than stare at one another until I broke the silence.

     "Usually it's Matthew I wake up to."

     He rubbed the back of his neck with a bit of a nervous laugh. "Yeah. He sorta got held up."

     I eyed him for a moment, a bit of a teasing smile crossing my face. "Does he know you came instead?"

     Nate averted his gaze, looking a little embarrassed as he cleared his throat. The utter breakdown of his singer facade brought me to a small giggle. I think I preferred this look for him.

     "If you are planning on apologizing, I'm going to throw something at you."

    My comment caught him off guard. It drew an actual laugh from him. "Why am I not allowed to apologize all of the sudden?"

     "Because it wasn't your fault," I said honestly. I knew he had been pushed into it, as much as I had a lifetime ago. He just had that effect on people.

     "Mind if I scoot closer?" Nate asked once we had time to our thoughts.

     "Only if you promise not to throw me in your pocket again," I mused.

     "Damn, caught on to my master plan."

     We stared at each other, then burst out laughing together. Once we had calmed down, he picked himself up and plopped down next to my table.

     "What were you singing?"

     He looked a bit surprised. "Simple and Clean by Hikaru Utada... From Kingdom Hearts?"

     I looked away in thought. The title sounded vaguely familiar. "That's a video game, right?"

    He gave me a slightly disappointed look when I shifted my gaze again. "You don't play."

     "Never had time," I admitted. Or money, but let's not get into that.

     He stared at me with a thoughtful expression on his face. "You'd probably enjoy it, not sure we could find a controller for you, though." Something seemed to occur to him, and he looked back at me a bit concerned. "Have you eaten anything yet?"

     I glanced back at my unlit stove, then sheepishly back at him. "No. Was still kind of out of it when I first woke up."

     Nate looked beyond my tiny house to the kitchen. He shifted so he kneeling towards my home. He offered a hand.

    I stared at his palm. I'd only ever ridden on Matthew's - I had been too stunned to remember what it was like in the studio. There was a bit of terror in my chest at the thought, but my curiosity won out. I pushed the window the rest of the way open and slipped out. I hesitated a bit in fear once I was outside.

     His fingers twitched back a little bit. "I mean, we don't have to-- I could just bring something"

     "No!"

     Heat erupted on my face, surprised by my own outburst. He hesitated, obviously not sure how to take that reply.

     "I'm... I'm not getting anywhere around here if I only rely on Matthew."

     Yup. Great excuse, dummy.

     We stared at each other for one more moment. He offered his hand again. I took a deep breath, placed a hand on his fingertip, and stepped up to his palm.