Dreams

One Day He Will Know- Bang Yongguk

**also posted on my tumblr**

One day he'll find out, he'll find out as you asleep.

One day he'll find out, he'll find it out as you hold it in.

He'll find out what you thought was imaginable.

You can lie awake at night believing your secret is safe.

But remember, He knows You.

I always loved him. The way he spoke, walked and looked at me. I loved him so much it drove me insane. It got to the point that the thought of him frustrated me. He was everything I wanted in a partner and more. But I knew he'd never feel the same way, and yet I could never stop thinking about what could possibly be.

He was closest to perfection the world would ever see. He was always so kind to me. He never took what I said for granted. Each year on my birthday he made to at least call, and he never missed a day, even when he was training to debut. He always found a way to get to I. He kept me grounded. He made sure I ate, slept, laughed, and smiled. He was with me when I got my heart broken for the first time, he was there by my side as my parents got divorced, and even though he graduated before me, he made sure to be with me all throughout the rest of high school. He always cheered me on, no matter what.

Over the years, I tried thinking of other people that took an interest in me, and even though some shared qualities of him. They were missing one thing. They weren't him. It destroyed me. My mother and father always inquired why I remained single, and commended me for it. Saying I should be single for as long as I possibly can. But they never failed to bring him up. They'd tell me how we're so close and that it would make sense if we ended up together. My siblings would bring him up also, and all it did was anger me more.

Then one day it happened. He found out. It was after one of my band's concerts. I had written a new song and performed it that night. I had to get out of my head. I told the crowd that it was for a boy I'd fallen in love with many years ago.

"Okay, I'm really nervous guys! Please do me a favor and sway your arms in the air for me and close your eyes, is that okay?"

The crowd replied in a scream. The screams of some 20,000 people.

I walked up to the piano, sat down and looked at my shaking hands. He caused this mess. I began placing my fingertips gently on the keys and sang.

Say it again, without that damn smile.

Tell me you care and that you'll stay for a while.

Look me in the eyes and hold me close,

Tell me you won't leave as my tears overflow.

Because you'll never know what you do to me

And you'll never figure out why.

Say it again, tell me how you're oh so proud of me

Tell me that you're my biggest fan

and that you'll never leave me be.

Look at me the same way you always have.

Tell me I'm your best friend

So that I'll know my love is a dead-end.

I love you, I always have and always will.

But you always blow my wishes like a daffodil.

I love you smile at me like I'm best I'll ever be.

But you always make me cry, you're like the sky.

Always surrounding me, but too far.

I love your calls even when you're to be asleep.

Perhaps one day you'll know me as me.