Better Than Me

Chapter 35

A/N: A little late, but I made it extra long to make up for that (I hope) - hope you guys enjoy!

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Chapter 35

I quickly pressed 'end' on the call, staring at my phone in horror. Oh, god, what had I just done? You didn't profess your love over the phone. What the fuck was wrong with me? There were three things you didn't do over the phone: break up with someone, fire someone, and tell them you love them.

I'd broken the first rule many times before. But now – the first time I felt the urge to tell a girl I loved her – I fucked up and broke the third rule by not telling her in person.

All I wanted to do was call someone else – i.e. my mom or Blake – and see if they could make me feel better about what I'd just done – but I didn't get the chance. My flight number was called out as I was hovering over the two contacts, deciding which one of them was least likely to make fun of me. It was time to board, which meant no more phone calls.

What if Sophia called back and I missed her call? Maybe she'd send me a text. I'd be able to see and respond to that, thanks to the airplane's Wi-Fi and iMessage. Or maybe we could FaceTime. Or maybe she wouldn't want to talk to me at all because she found my voicemail embarrassing and she didn't feel the same way in the slightest. Maybe I'd have to go live in a hut on a deserted island by myself out of sheer loneliness and embarrassment after this. I think I'd be fine. I could befriend the crabs and eat coconuts and shit.

These were the only thoughts going through my head as I went through the routine. I was a pretty frequent flyer. It came with the job. I normally didn't mind it, but flying out to an audition was the last thing I wanted to do after the dumbass voicemail I'd just left the girl I loved.

As I boarded the plane and found my seat in first class, I routinely looked down at my phone, waiting for a vibration that indicated a text, email, snap, anything. But nothing came. Not when I first sat down, and not in the five hours that followed as I made my way from Los Angeles to New York. I couldn't say I wasn't disappointed.

As the plane got ready to land, a flight attendant came up to me, clearly trying to keep a straight face. I'd had a rotation of flight attendants trying to attend to my every beck and need. I was guessing this went a little farther than their usual "attending" duties. At one point, I could see them fighting off in the employee area to see who got to come and try to bring me a drink, snack, entertainment, anything next.

"Can I get you anything else before we land?" she asked, nervously twiddling her hair and smiling at me. She looked pretty young, even for a flight attendant. She couldn't have been much older than twenty.

"I'm okay, thanks," I said, looking up from my phone for once to shoot her a quick smile.

"Okay," she said, still smiling that nervous, giddy smile, with some emphatic nodding mixed in.

I watched her pretty much float back to the employee area where some of the attendants were still waiting for her latest report. Some had already dispersed to do their jobs. Although I was still flattered by women's reactions to me, I no longer felt the need to check them out and gauge their attractiveness or my willingness to take them home. That was still kind of new for me. It was odd not getting that urge anymore. I guess as far as changes went, that wasn't a bad one.

After landing, I left the airport using a back exit to avoid the crowd that had gathered following news of my trip to NYC, climbing into the back seat of a car that had been awaiting my arrival.