The Light In The Darkness

Chapter 8: Not Enough Birthdays

A/N: I just want to say sorry to everyone who's actually reading this but I've been struggling with school and have a bunch of half finished chapters. I had a schedule I was going to follow but that obviously didn't work since this chapter was supposed to be posted in October. Now that I'm on break I'm going to try and catch up so I can get back on schedule but I can't make any promises.

Your birthday is your least favorite time of the year. Until last year you were able to hide your birthday from your father but unsurprisingly he got curious and figured it out himself. 

During your time with Dick while he was batman he didn't press the subject very much. For most people birthdays are to celebrate your birth and getting older but to you birthdays had always been to mark progress in your training. 

While you were in the league you were given basic tests every week, hard tests every month, and each year on your birthday you would be put through some kind of trial. You often dreaded your birthday each year the trials getting more horrible. 

On your fourth birthday you were required to climb the mountains. You broke your wrist but still continued. It was what was expected of you. 

Sometimes you were rewarded, after your eighth trial you were formally introduced to your mother. You had never met her before she was like a celebrity to you. 

On your ninth birthday you were sent on a solo mission to kill one of your Grandfather's worst enemies. You had to slaughter an army of 200 people single handedly to complete the task. You were rewarded with meeting your grandfather. And the reward for your tenth trial was meeting your father. 

Your birthday was only a reminder of what you used to be and everything you promised to never become. It was also a reminder of your mother and how she betrayed you. You told your father that you didn't want any kind of celebration and he promised to respect your wishes. 

It has been 6 years since you have been given a trial. The first two years away from the league you had been disappointed in yourself, convinced that if you didn't have a trial to complete you weren't making in progress. You hated sitting in that school not being able to do anything to prove yourself. The third year was the year you spent with Dick and that year you took your opportunity to give yourself a trial.

*Flashback*

You had been doing this since 4 am. You were tired but you knew that you couldn't stop, you had to prove yourself somehow, to find someway to make process. Your arms ached and after hours of of jumping, flipping, and running without stopping your feet had grown numb. You had broken three toes at some point but you weren't going to stop. You weren't going to allow yourself to stop until midnight and even then you weren't going to let yourself collapse in exhaustion. You were going to push yourself past your limit and continue standing. If mother was here she would be proud. 

You were so hungry, you hadn't eaten or drank anything all day and you didn't plan too. his was a part of the challenge that you set for yourself. It was a cruel punishment, even in the league you had been provided with a small amount of water during or before your trials. 

You had re-calibrated the training simulator and made it nearly impossible. Opponents were being thrown at you 10 at a time and there was no stopping. You had set the simulator so that your opponents would actually hurt you and if you gave them the chance they would kill you. The second you stepped into the simulator there was no stopping and you programmed it so the simulation would end at midnight. You couldn't stop it even if you wanted to because you wouldn't have a chance to get to the control panel but that didn't really matter. You would die before you ended the simulation early. It was almost 7 pm so Dick would be returning home soon.