Always - Kim Namjoon Centric

You also tried.

Namjoon breathed in. His hair had now been dyed a galaxy purple color. He looked into the mirror, with his head tilted to the side. Was this Namjoon? Was this really him? A smile adorned his face. It's him right? He is the person looking back from the mirror, isn't he? A chuckle escaped his lips, then a short giggle, until he was a laughing mess. The stylist team started to coo and laugh with him, glad he liked what they had done.

"I love it. I really love it." The stylist ruffled his hair when Namjoon jumped up and down in front of her like a kid. Namjoon had taken a step in accepting himself. He had taken a step towards healing himself, towards loving himself.

Namjoon's stylist team quickly pulled out an outfit to go with his looks, the kind of clothes Namjoon would never have worn previously to fit his hard and tough leader image.

Namjoon wore it, and quick to show the world; since for the first time in forever he felt beautiful, snapped a selfie, and then a picture. Posting it on the group's shared Twitter, he didn't mind the world looking at him as a weak Omega. A voice did nag him, thoughts did come to his mind, but he had to do this. For Hwanju, for himself, for the world.

Namjoon quickly made his way towards the concept photos shooting and met the members there. To say the members were surprised would be an understatement, but Namjoon came to them with a smile on his face, and for the first time since two months, initiated a conversation that wasn't about schedule outside of filming, well at least with Hoseok.

"Seok-ah, Are you feeling alright? If you are dizzy or anything, I can cancel the schedule." Namjoon asked Hoseok. He was worried ever since he had fallen during practice last week, but today was the first time he voiced his worry; he decided that if he was to heal, he had to start putting his present together, which was in shambles.

Hoseok was surprised, but nodded his head frantically, "I'm alright, How are you Namjoon-ah? Are you alright these days?" Namjoon looked at his former pack member, his friend, his longest group member along with Yoongi. Back when they hadn't presented, Hoseok, Yoongi, and Namjoon were always together through thick and thin. When Hoseok had presented as an Omega, Namjoon had been there for him. The same way Hoseok had been there for him too, but Namjoon had pushed him away.

Namjoon had always taken the burden himself and pushed everyone away.

Namjoon's thoughts suddenly drifted to his mistakes, and he looked down. He thought back to the question, Was he okay? Namjoon hummed and gave Hoseok a smile, a soft one, the one that left Hoseok breathless. "I'm trying hyung, I'll be fine. All of us would be fine. " Hoseok nodded his head. The soft moment between them didn't need words, they just stood in each other's presence as the soft air from the fans that the team had set up flew between them. The confetti flew everywhere, and before Namjoon knew, it was his turn for individual photos.

The group stood at the side when Namjoon stepped into the set-up. The confetti flew everywhere, and for the first time since BTS was formed and he had presented, Namjoon let his mind wander to all his soft fantasies. 

Cuddles, kisses, soft hugs, warm smiles, everything pure and sweet. A smile adorned his features.

He thought back to the words Hwanju had said; "The brain is biased to remember the negative memories more than the positive ones. Try to remember what you felt during the moments you fell in love. Try to remember the positive things more than the negative. At the same time, during every single time you felt the negative emotions, try to think about what the other person must have thought. Perhaps it was just because of the single perspective that you were hurt, don't you think?"

Namjoon closed his eyes. No one was there in the room, only him and his thoughts. Everyone dissolved, and he could feel Jin's warm embrace when after two years of BTS debuting they had turned into a pack. He could feel the wind as Yoongi chased him when he was running around reading the love song that was for himself, though it was supposed to be a secret Yoongi kept to himself until Namjoon presented.