Changbin

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Changbin is in a committed relationship with Felix. Changbin loves him very much, but he has grown fond of his boyfriends best friend, Hyunjin.

"You do and always will love Felix" he repeatedly reminds himself when Hyunjin is on his mind. And it is true, he does love Felix.

"Why? Changbin, Why? Why must you be so difficult. You are with Felix. Hyunjin is Felix's best friend, you can't hurt him." Played like a broken record through his mind at night as he is laying next to Felix in the bed they share.

The more he sits and ponders, the more questions enter his mind."Where is he from? Does he like me? Do I like him? Why cant I get him off of my mind? Why is he so beautiful?" Changbin is questioning every thing at this moment. But why?

For the past two years Changbin has seen Hyunjin every weekend. It was like a schedule, he would wake up and Felix would make breakfast then they sit around or clean, wait a couple hours doing whatever they wanted and hung out with Hyunjin till nightfall. He has gotten used to seeing his face to the point where if Hyunjin wasn't there it wasn't the same. Craving the sight of his face, his body, his smile. Eager to hear his honey like voice, to hear his laughter and to laugh along with him. and yearning for his touch and the smell of his cologne. Just thinking about him made Changbin blush, plastering a smile on his face.

Every minute they talked and interacted made Changbin's feelings grow stronger than before. He knew what these feelings meant because he had felt the same when Felix and him first met senior year of university. His friends would constantly pick on him saying he was like a lost puppy. Always agreeing with the dumb plans he came up with and doing whatever he asked. He was head over heels for him.

But as time went on, those feelings started to fade and chip away like old paint. They argued more and had tendencies to disagree on more things wether it be music genre or how to pronounce a word. Changbin could see the signs of their relationship failing. Felix started flirting constantly with a mutual friend of theirs, the shorter male didn't know if he was doing it intentionally or not. The feelings have simply faded.

He loved taking to hyunjin. He made him feel invincible and bigger than anything. Despite the situation, he always made him feel happy. When the day comes to an end, he was left to himself. He could only think of Hyunjin. He dreamed of his touch, his voice, his looks, and how he wanted to be held in his arm. The urge of wanting to be with hyunjin trumped his love for Felix.

He couldn't help to think about how Felix would feel if anything were to happen between the two. If he would be hurt, happy, or if he would shut us out of his life.
Changbin couldn't imagine his life without Felix. He had come to the conclusion that he didn't want to be lovers but only friends. Changbin realized, after analyzing many different conversations and arguments the couple shared, that the two males were not as compatible as they previously were.

"Why? Why are you putting yourself through this Changbin, you don't even know if he thinks about you"

Despite all of the questions there was one that always remained unanswered, "Why Hyunjin?"



Little did he know that Hyunjin was thinking about him.

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