celebrity secret hotline ※ taerene

eleven

the air thick with tension, joohyun sat on her bed crossed legged and stiff. the soft whirrs of the air curling from the dehumidifier on her side table and the light hums of the air conditioner above her being the only sounds breaking the constant silence.

joohyun's hair was disheveled, her milky skin now a sickly ghostly pale and her usual opalescent glow replaced with a dullness that cannot be explained. her eyes which used to be filled with the cosmos and the galaxies died down to a muddle blankness.

licking her chapped lips, she ran a tongue across them before lying down on her side. she concentrated on the fog curling up, billowing puffs of steam before dissipating into thin air.

her phone vibrated with a distinguished ping as the sound clang on the wooden side table. eyes widening, the sound of the familiar notification left her heart sinking deeper.

this was the reason she was so sick.

hyung.

she didnt know what was happening, why her body wasnt just content with his ambiguity anymore, his anonymity stabbed deep into her heart like a dagger and why all she could think of all day to keep her from going insane from the schedules was his deep chuckle.

she didnt know why at the end of the day instead of a call from him she craved his arms around hers as he serenades her to bed, why instead of a simple goodnight she wanted to taste his lips, or simply why she wanted to find out who he was; she just wanted to know.

it wasn't always like this in the beginning so why is it like this now? she groaned as she huffed. in the beginning, she was charmed by his chivalrous ways that would make possibly any woman swoon, but it was not of a level so personal, but a wistful admiration of his chivalry.

but she soon found herself blushing at his jokes, his light teases and flirts left her with butterflies in her stomach and her heartbeat pounding in her ears.

she wondered why she was acting like this towards somebody she had never met before but somehow knew so much more than people she met in real life.

she pondered on why she was acting so foolish and what her mother would say of her. she pictured her thick accented mother lecturing her as she almost groaned out loud.

paranoia about him filled the air around her like a bubble of anxiety but the second she remembered their past conversations, it was as if the bubble had been popped, like waves rolling across the sand that once held traces of her guilt.

the constant mood swings drove her mad, she wanted to split with herself and drive off, she wanted to take time off, do anything but think about him.

but without him, she hadn't been able to sleep at all, a wink of sleep was a luxury she wished she could offer, yet she couldn't bring herself to touch the sleeping pills or the cans of beer in the fridge.

closing her eyes, she forced her body to relax and drift into a sleep. she tossed and turned before she ended up thinking. eyes opened wide, her mind strayed and wandered on its own. exploring the depths of her memory, she came across a couple wistful ones, a couple embarrassing ones and one...that tugged at her. she couldnt help but dive deeper into it, closing her eyes, her memory finished the picture it had started painting.

a fifteen year old joohyun sat in class dreaming about this and that, before she found herself looking at a girl. she was interesting, with billows of brown hair piled atop her head, chubby cheeks and bright eyes.

she raised her eyebrows as she observed her. the girl who at first glance seemed to be staring at the teacher, but looking properly, her line of vision was a little left to the teacher and her eyes perfectly latched onto a boy. joohyun was popular amongst the boys, but even though the boys had a great amount of attention drawn towards her, it wasnt so much the other way round.