Midnight Butterfly

six.

I turned back around and walked back to her house. There was a sudden gust of wind in the air. The closer I got to the house I saw a shadowy figure on the roof. Slowly the image was clearer and clearer.

"Carly?" I said to myself.

I started running, running as fast as I could but the road seemed to get farther and farther from the house. I finally stopped to catch my breath and looked up at Carly. She looked right into my eyes, into my soul, and then jumped. I screamed as it seemed like forever for her body to hit the ground. The earth shook harder this time and all I saw was red when the drops of blood spattered all over me. I heard the crack of her bones and it made my skin crawl.

Waking up is no longer the pleasure it once was. I tossed and turned all night long. It was like I didn't want to sleep but was forced to. Yet now that I was up I would rather be trapped in that nightmare than in this reality. I turned away from the window and lay facing the door. Footsteps and light chatter were coming from the hall. I heard Carly's giggle and my heart shattered. I waited for them to leave. When the coast was clear I got up and entered the bathroom. I splashed some cold water on my face. I looked terrible. Pale, frightened, stressed and tired. I didn't want to think about anything or anyone. I just wanted to lock myself away in my room.

I sighed and exit the bathroom. Just as I did I bumped to Carly who was coming up the stairs.

"Hey, morning Max."

My eyes reacted on impulse and teared up.

"Morning." I whispered and rushed back into my room.

"Max is everything okay?"

I ignored her as I shut the door. Seeing her hurt, but hearing her, that was torture. Charlie came up the stairs and I heard them talking outside my door.

"Charlie maybe you should talk to Max. He's acting weird."

"What do you mean?"

"He looks like he's been crying."

"Maybe he just woke up."

"Charlie come on."

"Alright alright." There was a light knock on the door. "Max, you alright buddy?"

"I'm fine."

"How's about when I get back we hang out huh? You can't stay cooped up in there forever."

"Whatever." I replied.

There whispered for a minute before giving up and going downstairs. A while later the front door slam shut. I knew that must've been Charlie. They must've argued and I didn't do a damn thing about it. I couldn't. Carly's end is inevitable after all.

"Max?" Carly called out from the other side of the door.

I didn't answer. I just sat there with my knees to my chest.

"Max talk to me, please."

I sniffled. "Please go away Carly." I was holding back my tears as hard as I could.

"What's wrong?"

"I can't get the image of you jumping out of my head." I whispered to myself and my eyes started pouring.

"Max are you crying?"

I ignored her and dug my face into my hands. She jiggled the doorknob but stopped.

"Max don't cry. I promise things will get better."

"No, they won't." I said. "No matter what I do nothing will change."

"Tell me what's wrong."

"Just go away Carly."

I heard her sigh as her shadow disappeared from under the door crack. I lay down on my bed facing the ceiling. Every time I checked the time I thought back to what I would usually be doing at that time. Whether it was writing in my journal or talking to Charlie or even Carly. I just didn't feel any passion to get up. Every time I closed my eyes I saw blood, Carly's blood all over my shirt, my cheek. Even staring up at the ceiling I had flashbacks from the hospital, seeing her on the bed, with scars and blood. I was going crazy.

It was evening now. Matter of time before it happens now. I put on a hoodie and made my way downstairs to grab a drink of water. I took a step outside and sat on the steps. Any minute now I knew I would hear the far away cry of an ambulance and I would know why. How do I make it stop? I've repeated these two day so many times I've lost count. Will it ever stop? Is this some sort of hell I'm in?

I went back into the living room and turned on the TV to try and drown out my feelings. I couldn't stop checking the time. I just wanted it to be over with. I muted the TV and closed my eyes for a bit.

"Max." Carly cried. "Help me."

She was covered in blood. I was down the block as she lay there on the ground helpless, covered in blood.

I ran and ran until I was out of breath. I couldn't reach her. I couldn't save her.

"Help me Max. Please." She cried.

I jumped up from the couch. I was sweaty and my heart was racing. I sat up trying to catch my breath. I looked over at the clock and it was already the middle of the night. My head was pounding. I shut off the TV and sat in silence. I let her die. I just sat here and let her go. I turned my attention to the door as Charlie staggered in.

"Where is she? Where's Carly?" He was slurring, clearly drunk.

"Not here." I said sadly.

"Ugh my head." He fell onto the couch.

He was slowly fall asleep on the couch, drooling on the pillow. I got p and put his arm around my shoulder and helped him up the stairs. I got him up to his bed and undid his shoes for him. He was asleep like a baby by now, just like our dad. I put his phone close to him so he heard it when the call would come. I left, leaving only a crack of light sneak its way into the room. I grabbed his keys and took his car out for a drive. I didn't want to be there when he got the call. I drove down to this place we call lookout point. Just on the outskirts of town, you could walk up and see all the city lights. It was beautiful, my favorite spot as a kid. I always wanted to bring Carly here. I parked the car down in the lot and walked the rest of the way to the top. I took a seat on the ground. Staring out into the city I flickered around with the pebbles in my hand. I thought about how I got here. All the choices I've made since high school, since my childhood. I should've snuck out with Charlie all those times we were alone with dad. I should've never started using drugs, should've been more careful in college. I should've been there. Not just for Carly but for mom and Charlie. I was a disappointment to everyone, even myself. I tossed a few pebbles out into air. They slowly made their way down the lookout. I got up and looked down at the edge. It was just a stream of water about less than a hundred feet, of course on the way down you were greeted with thrones and rocks and probably poisonous plants. Part of me wanted to jump. I started tearing up. Of all the messed-up things I've went through in all my life I never fell this hard, but I was at my breaking point. There was a sudden gust of wind that almost pushed me back from the ledge. The sun was rising already, I decided to get out of there. I drove back home as quick as I could before Charlie was up. I left his keys the way I found them and went up to my room and locked the door. Just as I made it up there I heard the phone ring.