THE LOVE OF MY LIFE

17

What should I do? I asked the doctor and  it sounded stupid to my ears.

You should stay away from her because I am sure you are the reason why she had a miscarriage.

But Doctor.....

No But Mr Ashraf your wife's heart shoots up the moment she saw you, her blood sugar drops and her mind goes overdriven. I can't do my job when she is so emotionally unstable so you better listen to what I have said

Ashraf and Ahmad pov

Man I have fucked up big time I don't want to divorce her wallahi , I am regretting everything

I told you, you are going to regret it and now you must divorce her whether you like it or not Man did you see the dirty looks her family members were giving me when I went to see her? I am sure they are thinking I am in support of all the shit you do and they will think I am like you, you know the hausa saying Abokin barawo barawo ne and now it is a must for you to let her go due to what the doctor said.

Can you stop adding salt to my wound  Ashraf asked his best friend irritated
Before it was my want but now it is a need I need to divorce her whether I like it or not and I don't want to I love her so much.

Hannah's pov

Miscarriage
A positive test,the joy engulfed mysoul
No longer living for myself
A smile within my entire being
Red, body ached in pain
Dream washed away in a tide
How can something so alive
Be taken in an instant ?
It is just a fetus, tissue,they say
But I know better
It was my child, my baby
A living being
A part of my family
Tranquility turn to tempest
Joy turn to brokenness
Why?
why?
It can't be
I was already in love
I had already made plans
why?
"You can try again "
Like it is just that easy
Sadness,hopelessness
Is it worth another try
Will my body give another child a chance
Hope

It has been 2 weeks since I loose my baby and set my eyes on Ashraf and I am still in the hospital I know you are all wondering why I am still in the hospital well the doctor said I have to stay so that I can under go some tests and the results will be out today Well I am about to find out ,the doctor is here.

Can you please leave the room? I want to talk to the patient.

No! they don't have too, you can tell me in front of them thank God Feenah is not around.

Well since you insist I am so sorry to inform you that you won't be able to give birth again not exactly you can be pregnant but during your pregnancy they will be a lot of complications and that might cause you and the babies life or one of you might die and you can't give birth on your own ,a CS must be done on you. So my advise for you if you are all in agreement we will take you in for a tubal ligation to avoid pregnancy He finished his speech with a pity face.

Silent!!!!
My soul
Screams
In silent

Invisible tears
Becomes
Ragging river's
For all living
Things

Drink on my
Despair tail
It's dry as
Desert sand

Calm the
Screams
Of my soul

Doctor can't we do anything about it Ya Yusuf asked

I am sorry Sir we can't do anything about it that is the only solution

OK you should do it I can't loose my daughter Mama said crying

No Mama shouted Ya Habiba we should let her decide

Hatred that is all what I felt towards Ashraf I hate him with all my heart so many things are running in my head what if I didn't marry him? If I married my parents choice will my unborn baby still be alive? and the funniest part is till date I don't even know the guy and if he hears what happened to me he will be like if she had married me this won't have happened to her and I just realized not all love marriages work.

A month later
Hannah's pov
Till today I didn't hear from Ashraf not even a phone call talk less of him coming to my house to see how I am doing.

Yes I have been discharged from the hospital a month ago and I have been staying in my parents house sometimes I just want to go back to my house and continue being Ashraf's wife, I know the insults and beating won't stop and if he finds out what the doctor said he might get married again but that will be better than being a divorcee and somehow barren because no Man will want to marry me if he finds out what the doctor said I haven't accepted the doctors advice because I want to have a baby so badly.

I know what I am doing isn't right but I can't help it I don't want to interact with my family and friends I want to be left alone but they just don't get it they keep disturbing me Hannah come out from that room, come and eat come and do this come and do that well I couldn't take it so I end up shouting at them to leave me the hell alone but the sweetheart they are they refused to and that made me feel guilty.

I wanted to tell Ashraf's family to stop coming to my parents house because they remind me of that useless child of their's but I don't have the courage to say it out but I say it in my mind.

As'sallamu alaikum guys!
How are you all?
Hmm tubal ligation??
Do you have any idea what will happen next??

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