Three's A Crowd

Youngblood

Your POV

"Remember in Gold Coast, we went out in the middle of the night to the beach, do you remember what you said to me?"
"No," Lannan sighs.
"You told me you'd love me 'til the day you die. Don't you still feel that way?"
He drops his head and sighs, not saying anything.
The silence breaks your heart, "If you don't want to be with me anymore I'd rather you were just honest."
"Babe-"
His words make your stomach churn, "Fuck. When was the last time you called me by anything other than my name."
"I..."
You will him so hard to say that he wants you in his life but the words never come.
"Goodbye Lannan," you say before walking away. You fight back your tears until you're out the room where sobs wrack your chest and the tears flow like rivers down your cheeks.

---

You don't see him again until later that night, he's sitting at the breakfast bar in the kitchen. You can tell he's been drinking by the way he's hunched over, the huge pile of beer bottles next to him is also a dead giveaway. He clearly hasn't noticed that you're there so you hang back and watch from the doorway.

Even from a distance you can see that he's scrolling through instagram on his phone, he stops for a while every time a girl appears on the screen. It hurts so much but more than anything you're mad at yourself for hoping that he's still thinking of you, that he's reminding himself why he loves you. You know that's not true though.

You jump as his phone rings loudly in the silent room; he looks at the ID for a moment, you can't make out what it says, before answering.
"Hey," he says in a hushed tone, "alright, how are you?"
You back out of the room silently and listen from the other side of the wall.
"Yeah, well... She did most of the talking......... Not good."
You can't bear to listen any longer, it's too much to hear him talking about you, it makes you feel sick. So you go to the kitchen downstairs to get the glass of water that brought you there in the first place and head to bed.

For over an hour you toss and turn, unable to sleep, you can't stop wondering who it was that called. Eventually Lannan stumbles through the door and into bed beside you.
You roll over to lie on your back; both of you stare at the ceiling in silence for a few minutes.
"If you want me out of your life, please just say it," you plead quietly.
He sighs and you can see him run his hand over his face out the corner of your eye, "I don't want to lose you..."
"Then why do you keep pushing me away?" your voice cracks as you begin to cry again.
He turns towards you and pulls you into his chest, running his hand through your hair until your tears subside a little.
"There's something I need to tell you though."