drive || hemmings [1]

o n e // l o s a n g e l e s

ONE || LOS ANGELES

ｌｕｋｅ

I plugged in my earbuds and sat back in my seat. I finally get to relax. I had just finished touring again. I was on my way back to L.A to do my own thing. My band and I had decided to take a break from living with each other at a constant, so I chose to go to L.A for my part of the break.

The rest of the band went to different parts of the world. Calum is on his way to San Francisco, Michael's going home to Sydney, and Ashton's apparently going to Vegas. We were about to be as far away from each other as we possibly could be.

I knew I was going to miss them, but now I feel so alone here, on this plane, without my best friends.

We had finished the tour in Australia. I had a flight that was almost a whole day long, basically. I couldn't wait to get to L.A this time. I was gonna be miserable for the next day until this plane lands at LAX. Although I knew that this break was going to suck, I was happy to finally relax and hopefully not have to worry about so much anymore.

You see, me and my band have been living with each other since we were teenagers. We only go home to our families once in a while, and we're constantly making music, touring, doing interviews, meeting fans around every corner, and getting treated like objects, sometimes literally.

And I adore our fans. I love them to death, every single one of them. But, sometimes they treat me and the other band members like toys, and they treat the other people around them very disrespectfully. I try to stop it once I catch it every once in a while, but most of the time I fail.

I began to drift off to sleep as I looked out the window, showing the dark night sky with lights on the ground to show the signs of life on the ground. I forgot about how beautiful these things are, I forgot what it was like to see the ground from high above. I forgot about the little things that always brought me joy in the stressful and rough life that came with being a part of the music industry.

I missed this so much.

I kept drifting in and out of sleep, and slowly but surely I had fallen asleep for the majority of the flight. I thought about what I was gonna do when I get to L.A. I have an apartment there for myself, but I haven't been there for a while. I know the first few weeks were gonna consist of partying and drinking until I couldn't remember what I was doing that night.

I also thought about what this break meant for my band. I didn't wanna lose our fame, but I knew, we all knew that if we went on any longer, we would've ended up leaving each other. We wouldn't be a band anymore. The stress and the anxiety of the fame would be too consuming for all of us. I know that if this break ended up not happening for some reason, I would've lost my shit, and quickly.

My band is the most important thing in my life, other than my family. I don't remember the last time I saw my parents and brothers. It was probably almost a year at this point.