yoongi runs away when he feels he's getting closer to someone than he intended to
Yoongi is sitting behind his desk and looking through some old files when the door opens. "Hi, love." he spins around in his chair and smiles as he sees his boyfriend.
"Hey," he mutters, noticing a bag of food in one of Hoseok's hands. His mouth waters at the sight, he didn't eat for hours, he needed to get his work done first.
"What did you bring?" he asks him, a bit cold if you'd ask any person who doesn't know him as thoroughly as his boyfriend does, his boyfriend however doesn't pick up on anything when the smaller male answers him.
"Some noodles, nothing special." the man in the chair hums and stands up from his chair, moaning as he stretches his legs after sitting down for hours and hours.
"C'mere." the younger smiles, pushing yoongi's chair next to a table that's accompanied by a simple wooden chair.
Hoseok sits down on the wooden chair and sets the plastic bag down onto the table as Yoongi sits down in his own, tired eyes looking down at the food that's being set down in front of him.
"Are you okay?" Yoongi finally looks up into his lover's eyes, bags under his eyes visible as he moves his head up and down, nodding.
"You know you can sli-"
"I don't want to. I'm fine." his soft voice reassures the taller rapper.
"Okay," Hoseok takes a deep breath as he leans over the table to get a proper look at him. He softly pecks Yoongi's lips and sits back down, taking his hand in his own.
Yoongi gives him a tired smile. "You sure you're okay?" he inquires.
And that's when the elder gives up, "No, I'm not fucking okay, I'm fucking tired and frustrated, nothing's working out, I can't find the fucking beat, I lost a fucking file, I can't fucking-"
He abruptly gets cut off by Hoseok's voice, "I love you."
Yoongi stares at his boyfriend for a while, he seems in shock as his eyes widen and his heart pounds against his ribcage.
After a minute he can finally get himself to move and stands up, his chair falling down as it shoots back. He runs out of the room, down the hallway, and out of the building, he can hear his boyfriend's voice but he can't process the words, he just keeps running, his ears numb and his chest in pain.
The cold autumn wind caresses alongside his pale cheeks, turning them a dark red. He starts shivering but keeps running and running until his legs give up and he slides down against a brick wall in a dark alleyway.
You see, it seems like he's overreacting but he really isn't. They hadn't ever exchanged I love you's before, and Yoongi deep down knew he truly loved his boyfriend but he wasn't ready to admit to that feeling just yet. But now that he's heard the words he felt the need to say it back but he couldn't- and Yoongi was so rude to him and Hoseok still admitted his love to him, he doesn't deserve Hoseok, he really doesn't. And now he disappointed him even more by not saying it back and he ruined the relationship and he doesn't want to be alone again but he also promised himself to never get this close to anyone ever again and-
His breathing starts to pick up as he wraps his arms around himself, hoping to keep some warmth within his body. He pulls his knees up to his chest and wraps his arms around them as he feels a panic attack crawling it's way up to his throat. He knows this feeling, he knows it so damn well.
He tries to remember what his boyfriend told him whenever he was having a panic attack but the memories won't get past his dark headspace.
Dark spots start appearing, clouding his vision, "no, no, no." he breathes out, shivering as tears well up in the corners of his eyes, soon filling his whole eyes.
He lets his eyelids fall down, not being able to force his eyes open any longer.
-
"C'mon, where are you baby?" every person passing Hoseok on the streets would never think the rapper would have such a bubbly personality because right now he has his hands in his hair in a literal sense, pulling on it as his eyes wander through the streets, the eyes that are usually full of love and excitement are currently full of panic and worry.
He grips Yoongi's coat even tighter when he still can't find him after half an hour. He left his phone back at the studio too in all the hurry. He must be so afraid, the man thinks as he walks through the dark streets and passes pubs, god knows what could have happened to him by now.
He's about to turn back and look through another street as he hears a soft whine, he stops walking and frowns, "Yoongi, baby? Is that you?"
He turns the corner and sees a pale body laying down on the cold floor, showing no sign of life except for the barely audible whines that leave his plump lips every now and then. "Thank god." the caregiver breathes out, sitting him up and wrapping the jacket around his baby's shoulders.
"Yoongi? Yoongi can you hear me?" his eyes open slightly, followed by his head nodding. The caregiver immediately notices the boy is in the process of slipping.
"Okay, okay." he lays him down in his arms and rushes to his car in the parking lot of the studio, when they're finally inside he makes sure Yoongi is seated before making his way home with his exhausted boyfriend next to him.
When they're home he takes Yoongi upstairs and lays him down on their bed. He starts taking off his shoes, followed by his pants, turtleneck and jacket. The little finally seems to come back to reality bit by bit. "Yoonie is sor-"
"Shh, go to sleep, you don't need to explain yourself at the moment, rest now." he tells him, buttoning up his warm pajama's.
He pulls the covers over him after covering his cold feet with a warm pair of woolen socks. "You're okay," he tells him as he sees Yoongi still looking at him with a hint of fear in his eyes.
And that seems to do it for him since he closes his eyes and snuggles into the covers, leaving Hoseok to watch his babyboy close his eyes as he gets ready for bed himself, brushing his teeth and changing into a pair of joggers before crawling under the covers behind his little, spooning him.
"Yoonie love Seokie too," the little still manages to get out before falling into a deep sleep.
