Life after you

Prologue

   I sat at the office, and stared out the window. Everyone left for the day but I stayed. I had nowhere to go anymore.

   The world outside looked ugly. The rain was thick and the clouds darkened the early night air. I kept thinking about him.

   I don't know why, but even after everything, I couldn't stop.

   He threw me out after he found out I'd been talking to my ex. He literally threw me out, I mean, grabbed my arms and shoved me out the door. I still feel his strong grip around my arms as he yelled at me, calling me every name in the book.

   Shit, I was wrong, but not that wrong! He threw all my clothes out the stairwell and put my furniture out on the street in the middle of the rain. It was all ruined. I did manage to save my clothes and my vanity because by the time he threw it out I already had my cousins packing everything on their cars. They both came speeding when I called them. 

   The twins yelled at him to stop several times and he laughed. He actually laughed. My downstairs neighbor, that I had never spoken to in my life, got out of the house around that time, and punched him in the face.

 - "That is no way to treat a lady, asshole" - he snarled with anger.

 - "That's no lady dude" - My now ex-boyfriend whispered, spitting the blood on the floor next to him. - "Did you fuck her too?" - He asked him with disgust.

- "Shut up, asshole. Get the hell out of here" - My neighbor said, looking away from him and grabbing some of my belongings from the floor and handing them to my cousin Riley. He walked toward me and gave me a tiny smile, laced with pity.

-"I've heard some things from my apartment and, I know it's none of my business, but I didn't like it, so I just had to..." - I gestured for him to stop and looked him right in the eye.

- "I don't care why you did it. Thank you." - I said with tears in my eyes, and shrugged. 

   He just smiled, and went back inside.

   That memory had been haunting me for the past month. That night I went to Stella's house since Riley lives with her boyfriend. She tried to make me feel at home, gave me her guest bedroom and even told me to decorate. I tried. I bought a cactus, some pretty salmon throw pillows, a pretty duvet to match them, put my vanity in the corner and put up some of my photographs with the girls. Truth is, it felt nothing like home. 

   My home was with Noah. 

   I screwed it up with all those texts with Nate, but honestly, things were messy before that. I mean, I wouldn't have started texting Nate if they weren't. I know, it's no excuse. But I didn't act on any of it. 

   Still, Noah basically found the motive he needed to break things off with me with that, and still be "the good guy". Which really is all he cared about. 

   I looked around the office again and the silence made me cringe. I never really liked this job that much, but it paid the bills and allowed me to save money to go travel with Noah. We had been saving for a year to go to Latin America. I already had about 4.000€ when he kicked me out, and since I left, I managed to save about 800€ since I'm not paying rent, going out, eating out, nothing. I have been a social pariah. 

   I keep thinking: if I continue doing this, I'll find the courage to do the trip on my own but every time I think of it, it makes me want to cry like a baby. Like now.  So instead, I just pick up my bag and blazer and head out to the metro. 

   I'm outside the station, listening to the XX and staring at my boots when I hear someone speak dangerously close. 

   I look up and that was the first time I saw him. So much taller than me, at at least 1.90m, he hovered over my tiny 1.60m. His skin was slightly darker than mine, but what I focused on were his eyes. They were mesmerizing. The deepest green eyes I had ever seen, dark green, like a rain forest. His hair was disheveled from the rain, but a gorgeous dark blonde tone. He smiled at me. A real, genuine, almost amused smile. I focused on his lips curled up, revealing perfect white teeth. Smiles are the most important feature for me. And his was perfect.

   I realized I was holding a breath and staring. Rudely. I was clueless. I removed my headphones.

   - "What?" I asked quietly, frowning a little.

   - "I'm sorry, I was just asking you if you knew where I could find the Samsung offices, I know they are around here somewhere but I'm not sure where, and I noticed your badge..." - He trailed of, looking at me with a pointed finger at the card hanging around my neck, waiting for an answer. Right, I still had my badge hanging on my neck. Silly me. This fucking God just wanted directions, of course.

   - "Oh. Of course" - I shook my head to try and concentrate "Just up these stairs and to the right. Building B." I pointed to the path I had just taken, backwards. 

   - "Thanks, you're a life saver" - He smiled politely. Not a real smile like before. "Maybe I'll see you around...?" He asked me, starting to walk toward the stairs I had pointed to. I could swear those gorgeous green eyes looked hopeful.

   -"If I'm lucky" - I blurted out before I could process the information. I immediately covered my mouth with my hand, trying to hide the sudden embarrassment.He smiled a crooked smile and turned to me.

 - "I have a feeling I will definitely see you again." He said in an husky voice. I smiled as I shut my eyes a bit, giving him a doubtful look.

   I wondered if he meant that. Nevertheless, I watched him walk away and then went inside the station to go home.