The Prince's Secret (Prince Harry Fanfic)

Part 31 - Tea with the Queen

Harry

The roads were fairly quiet as I drove to Norfolk on New Year's Day, arriving at Sandringham late in the afternoon. I sent word up to my grandmother that I would like to speak with her alone, and stood around the fire in the drawing room chatting with Prince Michael of Kent, my grandmother's cousin, and his wife, Marie Christine.

"Sir? Her Majesty will see you now."

I thanked the butler and followed him through the corridors to a private sitting room near my grandmother's bedroom. The room was unoccupied, and I stood near the window, looking down at the grounds of the estate, mulling over what I would say.

"Harry. What a surprise to see you again so soon."

I bowed my head briefly to her as the Queen, then leaned in for a hug. "It's good to see you again, Granny. We didn't have much time to talk over the holidays, it was so busy. I hope you don't mind me coming here unannounced, but there is something I need to discuss with you and I don't think it can wait much longer."

She sighed and took a seat on a rose-colored sofa, gesturing me to take the chair close to her. "I've asked them to bring us up some tea while you're here. How was your New Year's? Did you and Meg go out?"

I made the requisite small talk with my grandmother while we waited for the tea tray, even though inside I was eager to bring up the subject I had come to discuss. But she was the Queen—she would choose to get to the subject when she was ready.

Finally, after the tea was poured and we were munching on biscuits, my grandmother said, "I feel that you've come here to talk about something unpleasant."

I looked down into my cup of tea. There was no way to soften this, so I said, "Yes. I think...I think I should call off my engagement."

"Goodness," she said, and took her time spreading jam on a scone before she said, "Why do you feel that way?"

The one thing I couldn't tell my grandmother was that I was seeing Samantha. So instead I said, "I'm just not sure about her, Granny. We've been having lots of rows lately. I think...I think maybe I rushed into this engagement, and I'm just not sure she's right for me. I want to make sure when I marry that it will be to someone I can stay married to, and I'm not sure Meg is the one."

"Just a few months ago we were speaking like this, and you were working very hard to convince me that this American actress was the one for you, that she could handle the pressure of being part of this family," Granny said. "What has happened to change your mind?"

Sam. Sam had changed my mind. Sam, who swept in when I was convinced that I should just settle for someone who loved me very much, and make the best of the situation. Sam, who felt like an old friend from the moment we first met. Sam, whose presence was like a pair of comfortable, well-worn denims after an evening spent in a tuxedo and wing tips.

I couldn't say any of that to Granny. I couldn't tell her that I was so sure that Meg wasn't the one...because I had met the one who was. I knew that what I wanted with Samantha was more than just moments and kisses stolen here and there. And for me to have that—some day—I had to keep Sam a secret from my grandmother...for now.

Granny was looking at me intently, waiting for an answer.

"What changed my mind? I...don't know. Spending more time with Meg, I guess. We really haven't known each other all that long, really...only about a year and a half. Maybe we rushed into the engagement too soon. I'm just not sure she's the one, Granny. And I can't marry her if I'm not sure."

Granny helped herself to some chocolate biscuit cake and poured herself another cup of tea. I had barely touched mine and I refused her offer of more.

"What does Meg say about this?"

"Meg?"

"Yes. You have talked about this with her, I hope? About your doubts? About wanting to call off the engagement?"

"No," I sputtered, "I haven't. I didn't want to upset her."

"Don't you think being told that the engagement is off and you won't be marrying her will upset her?"

I leaned forward, gripping my knees. "Of course it will, but I didn't want to bring it up until I had discussed it with you."

"It doesn't seem like much of a discussion," my grandmother said primly. "It seems like you've made up your mind."

Of course I had, but I said, "I didn't mean it to sound that way. Of course I would like your advice."

"My advice," she said thoughtfully. "As your grandmother, or as the Queen?"

I flushed. "Both. As always."

She sipped her tea, then set the bone china cup into its matching saucer. "I think perhaps you are right, that you and Meg got engaged too quickly. You didn't give yourselves time to get to know one another, time to see the not so pleasant sides of each other."

Candy, one of Grandmother's dorgis, came trotting in, hoping for a treat. Granny fed her part of a biscuit, then looked at me intently.

"Here is my advice, Harry, since you have asked for it. Don't get married so quickly. We'll postpone your wedding until the fall and move Eugenia's wedding up to the spring. That will give you and Meg more time to get to know each other."

"What?" I couldn't help it, but the word shot out of me.

The Queen gave me a disdainful look at my lack of manners.

I knew she meant well, and she was doing her best to try to help me. But I didn't want to postpone my wedding. I didn't want to get to know Meg better. I wanted time to get to know Sam better, without Meg in the background. Or foreground.

"I just meant—I mean, thank you for the advice, but I just don't think I can—we are fighting so much—"

"All married people have rows," she said, unperturbed. "Your grandfather and I used to row all the time when we were your age—although of course we had been married several years by then. You and Meg just need to get to know each other better, that's all."

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, trying one last time. "Granny, I really don't think this engagement can be saved—"

"I think you need to try," she said, and her voice was firm.

I leaped to my feet. "And if I can't? If I don't want to?"

The Queen tipped her head to look up at me. "That advice was from your grandmother. And as your grandmother—and the Queen—I should not have to remind you that you are fifth in line to the throne and require my permission to marry. Or not to marry, in this case, since we have already announced your engagement and begun planning the wedding."

My hands balled into fists. "So you are telling me I have to marry Meg?"

"I am requesting that you postpone your wedding another six months and take that time to get to know your bride better. I like Meg, after all my reservations about her in the beginning. She is very charity-minded and calm under pressure and I think she will make a good addition to this family. Calling off the engagement—and your wedding—right now would be extremely unpopular."

"And won't it be even more of a scandal in six months?" I asked.

"I'm hoping that there will be no more talking of breaking off your engagement in six months."

I shook my head. "And if I can't make this work? If I come back to you in three or four months and tell you it absolutely is not going to work? That I can't marry her?"

"We will discuss that if it happens."

There was nothing more I could say. She was the Queen. I couldn't force her to announce that there would be no royal wedding. The only thing I could do was try to convince Meg that our engagement was a mistake, that we could not marry, and approach the Queen together. I didn't think she would force us to get married if we were both against it.

I bowed sharply. "May I take my leave?" I asked.

My grandmother nodded. "You will thank me one day, Harry," she said.

"I hope not," I said under my breath as I walked out of the room.