"Ok, Lucas, you can do this." Luke said to himself looking at his reflection.
The blonde was shaking, Ashton was coming over in a few minutes and Luke planned to tell him all the truth tonight. Yes, tonight was the night. The blonde grew some guts as Calum said and last night he called Ashton, telling him they needed to talk.
Petunia barked and ran to Luke's room and the blonde understood that he was here, alright there was no going back.
Luke huffed and he fixed his hair one more time before walking to the front door of his little apartment. The blonde opened the door and he saw a grumpy Ashton. Luke grumbled, damn maybe it wasn't the right time to tell him. But Luke was tired to wait.
"You're okay?" Luke asked not bothering to say hi.
"Yeah." Ashton smiled."Just... yeah." He shrugged.
"O-Okay."
"You wanted to talk." He said raising an eyebrow. "So here I am."
"Ye-yeah." Luke smiled shakily.
The blonde closed the door and they both stood face to face looking at each other. They looked totally idiot but Luke was so nervous he couldn't even breath.
"So..." Ashton said softly, fidgeting with his jacket.
"Mayb-maybe we should sit."
"Wow, it's that bad?" Ashton asked raising an eyebrow.
Yeah. Luke thought but he just shook his head and walked to the sofa, Ashton following him.
"Okay so..." Luke started looking at his knees, he could feel Ashton's look on him and it was burning his skin. No, he couldn't do that. Ashton would hate him. "Ben called last night and he's gonna get married, isn't that amazing?"
"Hmm, yeah yeah that's cool." Ashton said frowning. "Is that the reason why you wanted to talk?" He said frowning more.
Luke's palms were sweaty and his heart was about to stop probably but the blonde knew that he needed to tell him, he couldn't live like this anymore, this relationship was toxic. He breathed one, two, three times and he talked.
"I-I just wanted to..." He started blushing because he was so embarrassing. "I mean I-I..."
Ashton looked annoyed and Luke was growing more and more anxious. He had to speak the truth and now.
"Please pro-promise me you won't be mad." Luke pleaded.
"What the fuck Luke just tell me what's wrong with you!" Ashton said taking his jacket off. "I can see that's something's on your mind these days."
"I-I..."
"Luke for God's sake just speak !" Ashton said roughly his eyes locked to Luke's. His tone broke the blonde's heart and he instantly felt tears building in his eyes.
"I-I love you." Luke whispered.
"What?" Ashton's eyes widened and he chuckled nervously.
Luke's heart broke again at the chuckle, but there was no going back.
"I am in love with you fucking asshole, and you're too dumb to realise it!" Luke stood. He breathed quickly tears now rolling down his cheeks from his nerves. "God I hate you so much right now and I hate myself even more for being so whipped."
"Luke what the hell are you-"
"Shut up!" Luke said. "Let me talk." He breathed and wiped softly his cheeks while Ashton nodded. "I know we were supposed to be friends and have sex sometimes but I can't do this anymore, it hurts me too much to know that you only wanna love me after midnight."
"I-I..." Ashton stuttered.
"Oh look who's stuttering now!" Luke chuckled but it wasn't funny.
Ashton tugged his hair and he rubbed his face breathing heavily. He seemed lost, he was lost everything was turning in his mind and all he could think of was the blonde boy here, in front of him admitting his feelings.
"Maybe I should go." He breathed before disappearing off the apartment.
He closed the door softly and Luke didn't even realise what was happening until he felt tears tickling his eyes again, and that's when he understood that his feelings weren't mutual.
