La La Land | Sanders Sides

Fourteen

Turns out, he could talk to all his fellow sides because they were all gathered in the Studio. Their conversation cut off as he walked in the room, an he fought to keep his head held high as their eyes watched him.

Patton gasped quietly as Roman held his hand out and made a rose that glowed softly. His hopeful eyes met Roman's and the Royal just said, "Dylan's gone."

Patton let out a squeak before rushing forward and engulfing Roman in a tight hug. The Royal didn't hesitate to hug back, relishing in the affection and positive attention. "I'm so proud of you," Patton whispered in his ear. "And I forgive you, for everything."

Roman wanted to tell him that he shouldn't forgive him, that Patton should protect himself, but he kept his mouth shut and nodded instead. "Thank you," he murmured.

Virgil gave his counterpart a small smile. "So, are you back to Disney songs and Broadway references?"

"Sure am, Virge."

And there was so much more Roman wanted to say, so much more he had to apologise for, but the words shrivelled up in his throat and he could only force out silence. For a moment, it was quiet.

Then Logan stepped forward. "Roman, I believe we all need to talk. We need to discuss Dylan's reappearance and how much pressure you've been under lately. Then we can talk about Thomas."

"Thomas comes first," Roman said stubbornly.

Virgil sighed lightly. "Princey, by putting yourself first, you're putting Thomas first. Just...worry about yourself for once."

"Indeed," Logan added. "Thomas needs you 100% better so that he may grow himself. If your Doubt, Dylan, has affected you too much, we need to find out now and try and fix it before it can affect Thomas more."

And goodness, there it's was, blunt as ever. There were no fancy words, no clouds of smoke. He had endangered Thomas and his ego during this, even if he hadn't meant to. Confidence was a fragile thing. Glass easily shattered by small rocks.

Roman let out a deep breath and tried to inconspicuously disperse the shaking in his hands. "Of course," he said. "If it will benefit Thomas, we shall have our conversation."

"Roman, how did you defeat Dylan?" Patton asked and the Royal tensed slightly. "Last time it took you longer, and it was a lot more gruelling."

A fair question, Roman supposed, but one that hurt all the same. "Suffering through his appearance was gruelling," he told them. "But his defeat...I figured it all out. I used his own effect against him."

"Explain," Logan said, genuinely interested. Perhaps this endeavour could benefit the others in the future.

"I didn't need to doubt myself, I just needed to doubt him." Roman smiled sloghlty, messed with the Rose in his hands. "As soon as he was gone, it was easier to breathe, to clear my head. I centred myself, came to find you."

Virgil took a few breaths before clearing his throat. "Why did he come back?"

And here, Roman froze. A tricky question, hard to answer, hard to endure. Why had Dylan come back? What had summoned him again, after all this time? Deep down, Roman already knew his answer, but it was harsh and accusatory.

You.

"I don't know," he lied, shrugging slightly. "Perhaps the pressure after the mind blank, the blame I had for myself. I was embarrassed, caught of guard. Perhaps he came in a moment of weakness."

"Or," Virgil said quietly. "You're just really insecure and it was the last push before you broke."

How shrewd, Roman thought. How clever of him. "Me?" He said incredulously, pressing a hand over his heart. "Insecure? Please, I'm a Prince, what do I have to be insecure about?"

And instead of words, Virgil just gave him a look that finally, finally, broke through Roman's most inner walls. He deflated, dropping his mask, his cover. He let them all see him, as he was, without the makeup and the sings, and the front he always had, even when he was upset.

"I am always tired nowadays," he admitted softly, looking down at his flower. "I cannot find it in myself to live in reality when I can barely handle the weight of dreams and love."

Patton made a small noise, something akin to a whimper, and reached for his fellow side, stopping just before he made contact. "Oh Roman," he whispered. "Why didn't you tell us?"

Ro,an could only offer him a shattered truth. "I didn't know how."

Short chapter sorry!

Next chapter is the last chapter, just a heads up!