A Hotter Touch, A Better F... Than Any Girl You'll Ever Meet

Chapter 11

I don't think my guitar had ever weighed as much as it did that night, not even when I was twelve and had to hold it for the first time. It felt like a dead weight against my shoulder, slowly pushing my whole body to the ground. Not to mention the fact that my legs felt like twigs that might snap any moment, my stomach was acting up and my head was aching. Cold sweat was dripping down my forehead and I felt clammy all over, but was extremely grateful for the fact that I was wearing a hat, that way the sweat from my hair at the very least couldn't reach my eyes.

I had problems feeling the rhythm the way I usually could and I was struggling to keep up with the others, exhaustion leaving my body a wreck as Brent's bass seemed to pound a hole in my head. The lights and sounds were making me dizzy and for a moment I thought I was going to fall, but I really couldn't do that, not when we were only in the middle of the fifth song and we had ten on the program.

The others were sending me concerned glances once in a while, but every time they did I mustered a smile, wordlessly telling them that I was okay although it was obvious that I stood pretty much rooted to the spot behind my mic, not at all having the energy needed to move about the stage.

Playing, simply standing was getting harder by the minute. I missed a chord, missed another, then managed to pick it back up, biting my lips so hard in the process that it started to bleed.

I knew they'd all noticed it by then. I mean, the audience may not catch a few wrong or unplayed chords, but the people that I'd played these songs with so many times, how could they not hear?

All three of them were looking at me more now and I could feel the concern pretty much radiating off them.

I nearly fell but regained my balance, repositioning my feet on the floor so that my dizzyness wouldn't cause me to fall again. Just twenty more minutes, if even that, and I'd be able to go to the bus and lie down. I could handle the rest of the show.

I focused my gaze on the audience, bent forward slightly to add the harmonies to Brendon's vocals. I nearly managed to stop the room from spinning.

Then, all of a sudden, there was an arm around me and I looked up to meet Brendon's gaze for a moment before he focused back onto the crowd that was going wild, sending the kids one of his trademark wide grins, though to me it seemed strained, even more so than it had been the last long while. Then he looked back at me again, face serious as he held his mic away for a moment, avoiding mine. "Just hold on for the rest of the song, alright?"

I sent him a confused look but he simply shook his head as he started to sing again, his arm still around me in support.

And while the audience didn't get the neccesesity of the gesture they were liking it none the less.

Finally, after another minute or so, I struck the last chord of the song and wondered what the hell was going to happen next.

"Hey guys!" Brendon addressed the crowd through his microphone.

The was a chorus of screams and indiscernable 'hi's back.

"I'm really sorry about this, but we're kind of behind schedule and to make things sort of go smoothly we have to make room for From First to Last out here now, so see you later! And be good to the guys..." He paused slightly before adding, "and girl."

The audience errupted in half-hearted cheers that went crazy when Sonny, whom I'd only been vaguely introduced to, stuck his head out with a questioning look on his face before withdrawing it again.

Brendon undid the strap of my guitar and placed it down in my stand for the roadies to deal with, then swung me over his shoulder with a grin directed at the audience so they'd see it as a joke rather than my being incapable of staying on my feet alone.