Finding the Blue

Introductions

Paige

'Come on kids!' I yell as I tug on a pair of well-worn suede boots. The yells and squeals from upstairs start getting closer; how can they be so full of energy at 6am?

'Here you are, love,' my husband breathes into my ear as he leans into kiss my cheek while handing me some slices of jam on toast.

'Thank you,' I smile as I snake my arms around his muscled body and kiss him.

'Don't,' he breathes while trying to both pull away and kiss me deeper. The thunder of feet on the landing is the excuse he needs to break apart. 'You know, this time of morning is meant for being in bed, under the blankets... naked.'

'I know baby but we have to get going. Besides, that's what 6am yesterday morning was for.'

'I remember it well,' he whispers before nibbling on my ear, snatching a slice of toast and dodging past me out of the front door just as the kids sweep under our feet and start putting on their shoes.

'I'll bring the bags then shall I?' I shout after him.

'Please,' he responds turning around with a smirk, 'you are so much stronger than I am,' he flexes his biceps to emphasize his joke and continues to the car.

'Thanks Mum!' Cari squeals as she helps herself to some toast and follows after her father.

'Yeah, thanks Mum!' her twin brother Curt echoes before he too is gone. Rubbing my belly I sigh contentedly at my little family, then pick up the rest of the luggage and follow them out to the car.

'Alright, the pair of you, settle down. The birds are quieter than you!' laughs Lex as he tries to wrestle the two 8-year olds into their car seats. He has a point though. Our house is on old farm house at the end of a country lane and surrounded by trees. The birds here can make quite a racket but they can't be heard this morning over the din the children are making; they are practically bursting with excitement.

After going back to the house, checking all lights are off, taps aren't running, nothing important has been forgotten and having one last toilet stop, I get into the car. A calm has descended as the kids have selected a film to watch and are munching on their toast. Lex is checking over the route, even though he knows it by heart. Once satisfied he turns to kiss me swiftly then we are off. The journey takes five hours on a good run, not including stops, of which there will undoubtedly be a few of. Still, the long journey, the ungodly hour, and the prospect of having to keep the kids entertained does nothing to dampen my excitement.

Bobby

'BOBBY BLYTON!'

The shrill voice is getting closer. She has been yelling my name forever. Growling I lift my pillow and pull it over my head. I don't want to go on the stupid outing. I don't want to hear her stupid voice! I don't want my life anymore. I want to be one of those other kids I see in school, you know, the happy ones. I like to pretend I am one of them. I am good at pretending.

The door opens with a click. My body starts shaking. I can't help it. Whenever I am around her I start shaking. It makes her more angry though and that makes me shake even more.

'UP!' she yells as she takes the corner of the blanket and tugs it off me.

'Ggrrrr,' I respond; it's the only noise I dare make.

'Look, I know you don't want to go but you have to.' I pull the sides of the pillow tighter against my head so I can't hear her. 'Let's face it Bobby. You don't fit in here. You don't want to be here, do you?' She pauses but I don't move a muscle. 'Do you?' She asks again, louder this time. I shake my whole body in response. She is right. Here is another thing I don't want to be. Tears start to fall from my eyes. I can't help it. I don't want to cry, it just happens. Whenever I remember I am not where I want to be, not who I want to be with, not wanted, the tears come.

'Hey,' she says with a voice less stern than usual. People are always shouting at me or getting cross at me. I don't think I'm bad but it seems everyone else does. 'Listen, this lady we are going to see, she is meant to be lovely. She has helped a lot of people, some like you.' There is a silence. Maybe she realises I have been told that before, I was even told it about her but she is just like everyone else. 'She has met the Queen so she must be nice right?' I shrug my body, there is another silence. 'Hmm, she even knows Dragoon. You know who he is right? Dragoon the... Dog Master?'

'No! It's Dragoon the Dragon Master!' I explain as I sit up so quickly my pillow falls to the floor.

'Dragoon Master, of course,' she smiles. I don't think I have seen that before. It suits her.

'Dragoon?'

'Yep, why don't you ask her when you see her?'

'Does she know Ligress and Totem or just Dragoon?' I ask because I don't really trust her.

'I don't know. But,' she adds quickly as I start to cuddle back onto the bed, 'I know she knows a lot of people. Like I said, she has helped so many -'

'Was Dragoon like me?'

'Yes, she helped him.' I jump up and start pulling my socks on. 'What's the rush?'

I hear something like laughter in her voice and it would make me stop and stare at her if I wasn't so eager to get going. It doesn't take me long to get dressed and grab the few things that are mine together. I push everything into my suitcase and head to the door. 'Well? Are you coming?' She looks shocked. I don't think I have ever said so many words to her.

Chase

The relief is instant. Pleasure sweeps from the entry point leaving a warm tingling in its wake. In mere seconds the sensation takes a complete hold leaving me sighing with euphoria. I don't know where I am. I don't care. This is all that matters. It is all that has ever mattered. The world melts away slowly. The voices fade out until there is nothing but me, me and the embrace of the drug I am lost to.

'Chase! CHASE!'

The sound of Jacks voice shakes me from my bubble.

'Is it time to go?' my words trip and stumble and sound completely stupid. Suddenly a pain erupts across my cheek. Instantly adrenaline replaces the drug making me semi-alert. Jack is standing over me, his hand raised, there is a strange man behind him and he is looking at me as though he is a dog and I am a bone. 'D... did you just...?' I ask as I rub my cheek, already aware of the answer. 'What's going on?'

'You need to start paying Chase.' Jacks voice is hard, his words cold enough to freeze me even in my current state.

'Paying? For what?'

'The drugs Chase. Didn't think they were free, did you? You have a debt and now I want to be paid.

'The drugs but... but...?

'But... but what?' he taunts.

'I thought...'

'You thought I was just giving them to you out of the goodness of my heart?'

'I thought erm...'

'Well, you were wrong. You owe me Chase. Hundreds of pounds now, what with interest and inflation and all that. But, lucky for you, my friend here is willing to pay some money for you.'

'Th-thank you.' I stutter.

'No Chase, he is willing to pay for you.'

'B-b-but... I am your girlfriend!'

'Aw Chase, when did I ever agree to that?

I watch in horror as the strange man hands money over to Jack and he counts it before offering his hand. They shake, deal done. Jack leaves. I scream his name, tears stinging my eyes but he never looks back. The strange guy clambers on top of me, his heavy body forcing the remaining air out of lungs. I struggle but he is strong and the drug, the drug I thought was my friend, claims a hold of my body once more. Its pleasures turned to torture.