A Girl, a Murder, and Twelve Dreadful Children

Chapter V: Amazingly Embarrassing Parents -- and Children

Thus conscience does make cowards of us all,
And thus the native hue of resolution
Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought,
And enterprises of great pith and moment
With this regard their currents turn awry,
And lose the name of action.
-- William Shakespeare, Hamlet, Act III, Scene 1

Dani had barely been in her parents' house for five minutes before she remembered why she had left home at sixteen and cut as many ties as possible with her family.

"Have you still not found a husband?" Janice asked, shaking her head. "How can you raise all these children without a man to help?" She glared at her husband, who was buried in a newspaper and happily oblivious to everything around him. "Don't you agree, dear?"

Niall's head briefly appeared over the pages. "Oh, yes. Quite."

The children, squeezed onto the armchairs and sofas like sardines in a tin, had the common sense to keep their mouths shut. Or maybe they were just shocked into silence. Dani wondered how she would ever be able to keep their respect for her when they saw her parents' behaviour.

"And all of you crammed into one tiny house," Janice continued.

"We do not live in a tiny house," Dani said through gritted teeth. "It's bigger than this house." Truth compelled her to add, "Slightly bigger."

Janice didn't seem to hear. "And I don't suppose you've got a proper job yet. How do you live? Do you sponge off benefits?"

This was too much to bear. Dani almost dropped her teacup.

"I have got a proper job!" Her voice came out much louder than she intended. Her mother gave her a disapproving look. Dani took a deep breath and forced herself to speak more quietly. "I work in the Spar shop on Main Street[1], and I write."

Janice shook her head pityingly. "Those aren't real jobs, dear."

If it was possible for steam to shoot out of a person's ears, Dani would have been that person. The children began to whisper and giggle amongst themselves. This only added to her fury. Did the little brats not think that she worked hard to put food on the table?

"I earn money by them," she said with calm she didn't feel. "That, I believe, is the definition of a 'real job'."

With the hand that wasn't holding her teacup, she discreetly gestured for Imogen to sit up straight and stop slouching. The other children, thank goodness, were back to being on their best behaviour. Niall was still enthralled by his newspaper and utterly oblivious to everything happening around him.

Some things never change, Dani thought with no small bitterness. Her mother was still an overbearing embarrassment. And her father was still so preoccupied by anything that wasn't his family that the house could collapse around him and he'd never notice. Once again, she envied the children she had gone to school with. They had had happy families and parents who actually listened to them.

This was followed by a most unpleasant thought. Am I going to turn out like my parents?

Perhaps this visit wasn't a total waste of time. It was giving her plenty of food for thought about her own method of parenting.

~~~~

The children handed over their gifts and reluctantly allowed their "grandparents" -- mainly Janice -- to praise or criticise them. Then Dani and her eleven charges made good their escape.

"Thank goodness that's over," Dani said as soon as they were safely down the street. She quite forgot that it hardly set a good example to openly complain about her parents.