not equal parts [s.m]

Thorns

As I opened the parcel, surely chipping a nail in the process, I was hit with a wave of a floral scent. Roses. Beautiful ones. Who got me these? I reached inside the box searching for a clue as to who sent them, and felt a sharp pain through a few of my fingers.

Whoever sent these roses clearly didn't understand that they have thorns on them that need to be taken off. I contracted my arm back from inside the box, only to have a rose stem still attached to me. I shook it off and inspected my fingers, and many of them were bleeding. Damn, something so pretty can be so painful.

I paced into my bathroom still staring at my fingers, trying to figure out which was most painful. I stuck my shaking hand under the faucet and blasted the cold water onto it. The smell of the roses followed me into the bathroom & didn't threaten to leave. Great. Now I stink of flowers. My hand was turning pale at the impact from the water & felt almost numb. I wrapped a hand towel around it and proceeded back into my room. This time turning the box upside down rather than plunging my hand inside it.

Out dropped a small silver necklace with the word "trust" in the centre of it. Who do I trust? Who wants me to trust them? Who sent me this? I search for answers so aggressively you could probably hear to cogs turning from the inside of my head. I noticed the price tag from the roses was wrapped around the stem on a few of them. They didn't even remember to take it off. Is it really worth knowing who they're from now if they put such little thought into it?

Reluctantly I pushed the roses around with my towel-wrapped hand, and found a note.

"However our chat went, I hope you like the gifts.
My teenage self isn't who I am right now.
I want you to be able to trust me when I say I've grown up.

Love, Theo x"

"Theo?" I whisper to myself. Why is he doing all of this?

I hear my mum start walking up my stairs to wish me goodnight so I rush to throw the roses in the bin, hiding what might make the gesture I received most obvious. My door opens as I toss my hand towel into my laundry basket, and my mum is dressed in her pjs and dressing gown.
"goodnight love, is your shift early tomorrow?" she questions, clearly tired.
I sigh as I walk into her embrace, "yeah, 11:00 o'clock. Goodnight mum" I say with a hint of childhood in my voice. With that she gave me one of her sweet smiles and shut my door.

I walked back over to my bed, where the cardboard box was resting. My mum didn't have her glasses on so she probably didn't spot it, but then again it did try to block her view.

I grasped the cold silver metal chain that was the necklace, unlocking the clasp. Trust is something I had & still have been longing for, so regardless of the fact it's off Theo, it means something. I turned to face the mirror(s) on my vanity & stared at the piece of jewellery hung around my neck. It looks like it fits in, like it belongs there.

Reflecting on the cool toned moonlight, the necklace compliments my slightly tanned skin.

Now on my bed, I sit consumed by the words on the note. Repeating them in my head to truly swallow & digest them. Is Theo really serious about this? Am I willing to go through with it? Do I forgive him and move on or do I press on with the fact that he really hurt me?

All this ripples through my brain as I go about my nightly routine.
PJs(done that). Face Wash. Brush my teeth. Put my hair up. Plug my phone in to charge.
I don't know about anyone else but I can't fall asleep without listening to something, so I would find a random Youtube video to listen to make me sleep. This time is was an interview with Shawn Mendes, his smile and his voice was enough to send me right to sleep.