how you feel

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theycallmemonty: first day of senior year was a success. glad to have my boys with me #blessed @Bwalker @zachattack

@Bwalker: #brosforlife

@zachattack: the 3 best friends that anyone could have

@raina_h: hurry food is getting cold losers

@omgitsjess: y'all better hurry you're gonna miss Raina do the chacha slide LMFAO

@theycallmemonty: we're on our way right now Bryce just drives slow. #shouldvetakenthejeep

Monty's POV

I sat shotgun to Bryce, which was a metaphor for our entire friendship, honestly. Always on the sidelines. He always had the money, he always got the pretty girls. It was a sad life to be in, but that's where I stood at Liberty. It sucked, because there were so many things I wanted, that I worked so hard for, and he didn't even have to try. Right now, I only wanted one thing in particular. My History teacher.

It was so wrong, in a way. But really, that's all I could think about. I was sweating bullets on the way to her house, nervous to see her. I had to get used to it, because I'd see her everyday until graduation. But something about being at her house, where she was just a normal person, like me, intimidated me. There were endless possibilities, some which terrified me more than others. My thoughts were interrupted by a screeching of the brakes. "Yeah, dude. This is it." Zach observed. We had arrived at Raina's house, and it was just as pretty as her.

I could her the music and laughter from the car, and see dancing silouhetes in the window. I recognized Clay's car, and Tyler's, so by the looks of it, all of our friends were here, which meant tonight was going to be a blast. When we all got together, it was nothing short of a good fucking time. We always found a way to make anything fun, and tonight would be no different. If I could keep my cool.

I should probably point out that I'm not exactly the relationship type. I found girls attractive, yeah, but that didn't mean I wanted to take them home to my mother. I didn't date, really. Hooked up a couple times, but never anything long term. I just couldn't get my head around the fact that when I met Raina, hell- I didn't even meet her- I just saw her on Instagram, I felt different about her. Maybe it was the fact that if we were together, it would have to be as low key as possible.

It was shitty. Wanting someone you couldn't have. I was definitely crushing on her hard, and the way she smiled at me in class... Part of me wondered if maybe she wanted me too? I would never want her to lose her job, and technically, she wouldn't. I was grown, so was she.. It was just...frowned upon. I was willing to risk anything, honestly. But I knew she needed her job.

We made our way in the house just in time to see Raina doing the chacha slide. She was a good dancer, that's for sure. Jess was recording her, Justin was trying to keep up with her, and Tyler was, of fucking course, taking pictures of her. Bryce jokingly jumped right in, clapping his hands and turning when needed. He just couldn't get the chacha right.

"Food's in the kitchen," Raina yelled over the music, and we immediately took off to the kitchen. I was starving, so was Zach. There was a gob of takeout, from pizza to Chinese. I grabbed a slice of pepperoni and an egg roll, then I noticed Zach giving me a funny look.

"Plenty of egg rolls dude, I just grabbed one," I said innocently, and he chuckled and shook his head. "Nah man I don't even like egg rolls. It's just..do you realize how you look at her?" I stopped mid chew. "Who?" But he already had me figured out. I sighed, and checked to make sure Raina was still dancing before I responded. "Dude, it's just a silly crush. I'll get over it, ya know?" If anyone could tell I was lying, it was Zach. He shook his head and called bullshit. "You look at her like...she's already yours. Like, I can't explain it Bro. It's intense. You barely even know her."

I put my pizza down and sat at the table. "Yeah, I know. I just.. She's in my head dude, I don't know how to explain. I just really like her." He sat down with me, his hands together on the table. "Maybe you should talk to her? I mean it would have to be like, CIA discreet but she may be interested dude. You never know." I nodded, finished off my egg roll. It was weird, being so open with him about my feelings. I never did that. "Dude it's fucking terrifying," I admitted, running my fingers through my hair. And it was, liking someone who was so far out of my league. Not being able to just...take whatever I wanted, like Bryce would do. He was that sort of guy. If he wanted it, it belonged to him.

"I know Monty. You just gotta give it time, man. We just started back to school, we've known her literally a day. You may not like her the more you're around her. Who knows. Maybe you will. Either way, this is our senior year. We can't let this shit like this get in the way of this being our year."

He was right. But I knew what I wanted. And I was going to prove to her I could be what she wanted too.

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