Weak !

Daily life

I look like a normal girl from the outside. But, I wasn't normal. I used to think why am I so pathetic... I felt like nothing was exciting anymore. I gave up on myself and just lived an empty life.

My Aunt used to tell me not to give upon life. She was worried sick after I tried to kill myself by cutting my wrist. I didn't have friends ever since then. I was one the few people who people tend to stay away from because of my impurities. Since, I might spread them. I had to stop my studies halfway through because of my coward self. I couldn't face my fake friends anymore and I was stressed out.

It's been a year since my Mom died and I had nobody. I lived in a small house with no family. I wanted to sell the house and buy an apartment but it was the only thing that remained of my mom. I was emotionally attached to it.

I work in the supermarket nearby as a cashier. I had one person who could be considered as an acquaintance there. She was Trisha, a girl in her early twenties with raging hormones. But ,she has her cute side too. It comes in handy when our manager scolds us when a problem rises up.

"That would be 60$, Sir " I handed the bill to the customer,a middle aged man who paid the bill while his wife was scanning through the bill.

"Thank you,Sir. Do visit us again." I had to smile and wave as the couple left.

"Was that the last person?" I asked Bobby. Bobby was our senior. He had worked in the market for 11 years . He was a guide to us and we all depend on him so much.

"That's it, Anna". He replies. Yes, my name is Anna. I'm not really fond of my name. My Mom was one who came up with it .

I was closing the door when I heard a person call out to us.

"I am sorry my friend really needs a first aid kit , right now." He was a very young boy in his teens. He was in such a hurry,that he kept fidgeting.

"Sorry, we are closed ." Bobby was strict.

"It's alright Bobby . I'll take care of this ." I said to him. I was somehow used to helping people.

"Thank you, so much ." the boy said.

I went inside to get the first aid kit and gave it to him.

"Would this do?" I asked him.

"Yes,thank you. How much is it ?" I had to switch on some of the lights , insert paper into the printer and gave him his bill.

He rushed out of the market as soon as he paid.

I had to check everything, switched on lights and stuff. When I was done , I locked the door and put the keys in my bag . I sat in my car sighing. It was a long day .

As soon as I went back I saw two letters in my box and yeah they were marriage invitations of my college mates. As if am gonna go . I threw my bag aside and laid on my bed. I don't feel like cooking or eating. I went to take my medicines as if they were helping. I grabbed one tablet from seven of the containers and threw them inside my throat along with some water. I had been taking tablets for such a long time. But still I wasn't able to tolerate the sour taste .

I brushed my teeth and wore my pjs . I was ready to sleep. But, before that , I opened my diary to write about even the smallest things I noticed today at work. And as soon as I was done I switched off the lights and hugged my pillow tightly and was so happy to do the most favourite thing in the world... Sleeping. I feel tired 24x7 due to the increased dosage, and sleeping was something I could do without any effort and it was pleasing.

I drifted off to sleep and right when I was about to hit delta waves ,my phone rang. I cursed under my breath and took my cellphone , just to see and unknown number. I cursed again and put the phone on silent and went to sleep. Well, guess what the phone rang again.

I answered the call in a tone ,that would make the caller realise what they had done.
I need to fucking sleep.

"Hey ! Anna. It's just me Sid" he said. Sid was my childhood friend, we lost contact after middle school and patched up last year at my Mom's funeral. He doesn't know about my health condition and yeah that's why he never left. If he knew ,he would also leave just like the others.

"Hey, Sid. I was sleeping." I whined.

"I've got good news." He said.

"You're getting married!?" I said in a monotone.

"Yeessssss ! How did you know! You are a mind reader, Anna", he was excited.
It wasn't that hard to guess.

"Well, I want you to be there . Definitely !" He said.

"Sure ..." I agreed . I wanted to see him happy and well settled.

"Great. Oh ! I will send the details soon." He said.

"I get it . Can I sleep now ?" I asked him.

"Yes, of course. But you know-" I ended the call and went back to my precious sleep.