Eighteen With A Chalkboard

Chapter 10: The Newton-Raphson Method

To my surprise, every seat is occupied by students.

The room buzzes with chatter, but as soon as they see me standing in front, the noise fades. Kane takes a seat behind an Asian guy by the window.

My heart pounds as I feel their eyes on me. I drag my feet to my mahogany desk, place my bag on it, and nervously rub my hands together. "M-morning, class!" I blurt out, my voice loud and shaky.

Silence. Except for Christopher, who waves at me with a grin.

My legs tremble, and sweat beads on my palms and armpits. The air feels thick, choking me. I hadn't expected a full class. "Ex...Excuse me!"

I grab my bag and rush out of the room. Once outside, I fumble to unzip my bag, pulling out my medication. I pop two SNRI pills and swallow them dry. After a minute of deep breathing, I re-enter the classroom, avoiding eye contact.

I set my bag on the desk again and take a steadying breath. "Sorry about that, ahem, I just..." I lick my dry lips. "Uh, let's take out our...books. Uh, Calculus!"

The students pull out their books, serious expressions on their faces. I can't believe they actually listened to me.

You can do it, Jonathan.

I grab a piece of chalk with shaky hands and write "Solution of Algebraic and Transcendental Equations" on the chalkboard.

Turning back to the class, I lock eyes with Chris. He smiles and gives me a thumbs up. I smile back, feeling a bit more grounded.

"Alright, everyone," I say, though my hands tremble slightly. I blink twice and swallow hard. "Let's dive into the Newton-Raphson method."

Everyone stares at the chalkboard with expressions that look like they've just been told they have to solve a Rubik's Cube blindfolded.

My heart pounds as I scan the room, my gaze landing on Millie, sitting in the middle with her boyfriend, Sawyer. Millie avoids eye contact, her head lowered as if she's hoping the floor might open up and swallow her.

I take a deep breath, trying to keep my nerves in place. "Can someone tell the class what the definition of the Newton-Raphson method is?"

An Asian guy at the back, Kagawa Chung, chuckles and shakes his head, sharing a look with Sawyer. My stomach churns. Are they laughing at me?

I look away from him quickly. "Anyone?"

"You're the professor. Why don't you tell us?" one of the twins without glasses pipes up.Ben and Bennett Marshall-luckily, I studied the student roster, though I can't quite match names to faces yet.

Again, Kagawa laughs. My palms grow clammy.

I raise an eyebrow and look at him, my voice shaking slightly. "Kagawa, it seems like you know the answer. Do tell us the definition of the Newton-Raphson method."

"Your way of dressing reminds me of my late grandfather," he says, laughing. The whole class joins in, their laughter ringing in my ears.

Don't let his words get to you. Just ignore them, I tell myself. "Try again, answering my question, please."

"Please?" Kagawa chuckles, looking over his shoulder at Kane. "He sounds like a kid begging for an extra cookie."