Into the Deep || BTS AU

Eleven

Life in a big city, like Seoul, is bright and noisy all the time, day and night. The bright lights and bustling never seem to calm, even during the night. So it is not often that Jungkook experiences quiet and peaceful moments. Even on the ship, nothing seems to just stop. Waves rock the boat and someone is always doing something to keep things running. Jungkook often found himself wishing time would stop, giving him a minute of peaceful quiet, but there was work to do and things to see. No time to sit around and watch the world go by because no matter how much he wished for time to pause, it wasn't going to happen. 

That became very clear when their ship started to go down. Everything seemed to happen so quickly. One minute Yoongi, Namjoon, and him were on deck, having a good laugh and enjoying the salty ocean breeze. Then all Hell broke loose. Yoongi, who was leaning against the railing, fell overboard when the boat drastically tipped. Namjoon just barely caught Jungkook before he jumped in to get him as the boat tipped the other way sending them crashing to the other side of the deck. Crates and supplies when overboard next, thousands of dollars worth of stuff falling into the water never to be recovered, along with a priceless life. The boat continued to violently rock and more waves crashed into it, Namjoon and Jungkook hanging onto the railing for their lives. They tried to spot Yoongi in the waves but Jungkook knew they wouldn't find him. 

The wind was another issue. They couldn't get to the door inside or get people out. Namjoon tried his hardest to open the door but the wind was pushing against him. The wind howled at them, muting their cries of help. Behind them, more things fell overboard, their life rafts and safety jackets floating away. Jungkook knew that there was no hope of getting in and dragged Namjoon to the side of the ship again. It didn't take him long to convince Namjoon to jump overboard, mainly because he wasn't given an option. After some arguing Jungkook finally had enough and pushed his Hyung into the water, following right behind him. 

Jungkook dived into the freezing water, and it took a bit of effort to surface since the ocean didn't seem to want to calm down. He looked around, adrenaline pumping, to find Namjoon. Hoping and praying he didn't just kill his friend when he carelessly pushed him in. Luckily he spotted him not too far away, managing to climb into a life raft that fell into the water. Jungkook swam as swiftly as he could to Namjoon, the cold starting to numb his legs. It took a few minutes of painfully being thrown around by the waves and dunked back under the water but he managed to make it to the raft Namjoon had desperately tried to get closer to Jungkook. Namjoon gave him a hand and pulled up the exhausted younger on the raft. 

After Jungkook was fully in, they both got a good hold on the raft and slipped on life jackets they managed to reach from in the water. They grabbed onto to sides of the small boat tightly, trying to prevent it from tipping over while also keeping an eye out for Yoongi again. Out of the corner of his eye Jungkook caught sight of the ship again, noticing that no one was on deck and the door was still shut. They were pretty far from the ship as they watched probably the biggest wave yet, crashed into the side of the ship effectively knocking it over. Jungkook thought he even caught a glimpse of figures looking out the windows, but he was too far to be completely sure. 

They watched helplessly as the ship sunk, their friends and co-workers still inside. Neither of them cried, the exhaustion and shock numbing them just like the freezing water. The wind made them almost unbearably cold. They shivered as they clung to their raft as the waves slowly died down and the wind became the salty breeze they were enjoying just a few minutes ago. 

Jungkook shot up out of the bed, sweat covering him from head to toe. He struggled to catch his breath as he thought back to his dream, no, the memory of what had happened earlier that day. Something wet fell off his chin and it was then he realize that he was crying. Jungkook quickly sniffed and wiped his face before he turned on the light beside the bed and sat on the edge with his elbows on his knees and head in his hands. He tried to calm himself down but no matter how cozy and warm this room was, it started to feel as if it was closing in on him. 

Jungkook slowly stood up on shaky legs and opened the door to the small deck, the soft breeze hitting his bare chest. He leaned against the railing for support and looked up at the sky. Bright stars lit up the light, the moon full and shining. He had always loved the stars, he never got the chance to admire them in the city. The bright lights always hid them from sight. It was part of the reason he loved being in the middle of the ocean, with no city lights to hide the beautiful stars. If he were any good at math he would have considered being an astronaut. 

Somehow the stars seemed to shine brighter here, it was almost as if he was closer to them. He closed his eyes and basked in the quiet, no cars honking and no machines beeping. The only noise was the distant sound of waves hitting the shore and bugs doing their thing. He relaxed fully and let his head drop between his hands, but the quiet was soon replaced with his loud thoughts. He thought back to his nightmare, remembering how vivid it was. In the moment, everything happened so fast that it was hard to keep up with everything, nothing seemed to matter except his and Namjoon's survival. As horrible as it sounds, no one else seemed more important than finding the man overboard, than Namjoon. He chose to jump overboard, he never listened to what Namjoon had to say about the matter because Namjoon and him still had a chance to live. Yoongi still had a chance. 

In his nightmare, every detail became clear. He could have made so many different choices that could have saved more lives. He could have gotten Namjoon safe and found another way in the boat. He and Namjoon could have worked together. But what if they didn't jump off the ship and they had died, would Yoongi still be alive, or would he be alone with these strangers on an unknown island. 

The shock and adrenaline were long gone, the instinct to survive pushed aside because he was safe. But now all the pent-up feelings and sorrow catching up to him. He couldn't help but blame himself for all the lives that were lost, that could have been saved if he had not panicked and been so selfish. 

That last thought was all it took for him to completely break into sobs. Tears streamed down his face and he struggled to breathe as broken cries poured out his mouth. He tried to quiet them by covering his mouth with his hand, hoping he wouldn't wake anyone with his cries, but deep down wanting someone there to comfort him, tell him what he did was the right thing despite his mind screaming at him otherwise. 

Hiccupping and sobbing, Jungkook legs shook struggling to hold him up. He gave up trying to hold himself up and finally stumbled back against the wall, slowly sliding down before collapsing onto the deck. His cries only intensified so he curled himself into a ball to try and muffle the sound.  

Thinking he was alone, Jungkook tried to calm himself down with deep breaths but they were broken and shaky, and a sob would work its way out every time. He didn't realize he had company until he heard someone hit something to his left and a quiet hiss of pain escape them. His head quickly shot up and he wiped away his tears thinking it was Namjoon. 

"I'm sorry for waking you up Hyung," He continued to wipe his eyes and cheeks as he spoke, "I just needed fresh air." Jungkook took a deep breath and looked at who he thought was Namjoon but instead, to his surprise, was a handsome boy with silver hair. The boy's eyes were just as wide as Jungkook's, his head just poking up above the ladder. "You're not Namjoon."