All You Did was Save my Life

What I Was Taught

            The Impala sped down the highway towards Bobby's house. The three occupants of the car were silent, the only sound to be heard was the engine.

            "Dean-" Cas started from the backseat, but Dean cut him off.

            "Don't Cas!" he barked, tightening his grip on the steering wheel, "Just don't..." Sam looked back at the angel and tried to smile at him reassuringly, but Cas continued to look downcast.

            "I was merely going to say," Cas started, "If you would prefer, I could fly back to Bobby's. I can tell my presence makes you uncomfortable so the best solution seems to be my leaving.

            "Cas you can't fly back to Bobby's," Dean said exasperated, "You're not strong enough yet and you used all your angel mojo to get to Jesse's." Cas didn't respond right away and the car fell into silence.

            "I'm sorry Dean," the angel finally said.

            "Dammit Cas," Dean said, "I don't want your apologies!"

            "What do you want?" Cas asked, but Dean didn't reply, "Dean, what do-"

            "You were willing to kill a kid, Cas!" Dean shouted, "Because people said he was bad, you were willing to kill him!"

            "He wasn't actually a child Dean," Cas defended himself half-heartedly, "He wasn't even human."

            "Neither is Jamie!" Dean shouted, "The angels say he's no good and they want to kill him, does that mean we should let them? Should we hand over our kid?"

            "No of course not," Cas said, "Jamie is only a baby." Realization slowly came over his face and he looked down at his lap.

            "I'm sorry," Cas repeated quietly.

            "Just don't Cas," Dean sighed and the car lapsed into silence again. They finally arrived at Bobby's and Dean got out and walked into the house. Cas was much slower getting out and when he did he saw Sam was still standing there.

            "I thought I was helping," Cas said, "I didn't want to kill him, but there didn't seem to be another way."

            "After years of doing this job, if there's one thing I've leaned, it's that there's always another way." Sam told him and walked into the house. Cas followed slowly behind and when he entered the house he saw Sam sitting on the couch with Bobby and Ellen.

            "Alright Cas?" Ellen said when he walked in.

            "Where is Dean?" Cas asked.

            "He went straight up to see the boys," Bobby said and Cas nodded before making his way up. They watched him go before Ellen and Bobby turned to Sam.

            "Are they okay?" Ellen asked and Sam grimaced.

            Upstairs, Dean sat in a chair in the boy's room. He held Jamie in his arms while Ben sat on his lap. He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't notice when Cas  entered the room.

            "Dean," the angel said quietly and Dean glanced at him.

            "Cas, not in front of them," Dean sighed.

            "Please Dean," Cas said, dropping down in front of Dean and the boys, "I thought it was the only way. It's what I was taught. If there is a threat then you eliminate it, not matter what form that threat takes. But I wouldn't... Ben and Jamie are important to me. I didn't not understand the care humans had for one another until you and then boys. Of course I knew what love was. I loved my father and my brothers, but now it is different and I know what it is like to be willing to do anything for someone, even if it is not right."

            "So..." Dean said slowly, "It was a combination of thinking you were doing the right thing and tiring to protect the boys?"

            "I know you do not believe me," Cas said, "But I will prove to you that is true. Whatever you want me to do I will do it." Dean stared at the angel in front of him, trying to figure out what to say.