Sebastian Stan One Shots

Come back to me

The apartment was quite as they walked around it, the only sounds being the cars passing by and her voice calmly, yet with a note of excitement and a tiny bit of nervousness, explaining how he should move around and where to look for whatever he might need.
"The toilet is just down there on the left and there's a bunch of towels in that hamper over the bathtub" Lily gestured around the area, her new roommate in tow.
Bucky Barnes was gripping the brown-haired girl in sweaty, tense hands; his heart was pounding in his ears and not even the calming techniques Fury had taught him before discharging him from shield were of help in that moment. His breathing just couldn't seem to do anything but rage up as he tried to listen to her voice and block out everything else.

From the corner of his eye, he could see the excitement on the shorter girl's face: Lily was so desperately eager to introduce Bucky to her life, she had been for so many months, so Bucky felt a little guilty that all he could concentrate on, was how everything surrounding him seemed so far from the Hydra bunker he had been confined to just a week or so earlier.
As they reached the living room, his blue orbs could make out the dimly lit room with the sort of orange light that makes you feel warmer and he really tried to feel that way. There was a cushion on the couch with a flower on it and a magazine or two related to articles for the house on the coffee table. This apartment had life, not just function.
"Help yourself to anything in the fridge too, of course. Banner said that your iron and sugar levels were pretty lousy so.. Bucky?" Lily stopped when she saw the look in the soldiers's face.

Bucky just nodded vacantly, tears tightening in his throat. The apartment had dissolved around him; the sound of gunshots and cars' tyres as well as his own arm tearing into the Captain's shield throbbed through his head.
The uncomfortable tension in his chest increased as the image of Lily's face -contorted with confusion and pain as she had to fight the man she had grown to love over the past months he was free from Hydra-, took its place in the flashback alongside Hydra and experiments and surgery and everything else. Bucky's legs contracted, ready to sprint and Lily was very aware of that too. The lack of real pain that he was used to in a body that was periodically tortured, sometimes just to see what would happen, made him feel numb: it made him feel aware of this vessel of a body that he had regained ownership of and he felt like a child who had been given the keys to a truck. What was he supposed to do?

"Come back to me, sweetheart" Lily whispered, her heart clenching inside her chest, aching for the man she so desperately adored, but Bucky shook his head emptily, "Remember where you are. With me, you're safe."
Lily waited, watching as Bucky's large, dark eyes followed invisible movements and shadows before falling completely still. With a shaky breath he was back in the room. She put her hands on Bucky's hips and gently nudged him backward to the wall, trying to calm him down by making contact with something of concrete.
Bucky let his head lull back against it and sighed, heart still thudding with a rythm that he could feel in his throat. Lily pressed her lips against the tip of Bucky's nose and held them there until she could feel the muscles in the soldier's sides relax. She moved her feet forward until their thighs touched slightly and cupped Bucky's face in her hands, gently kissing him, slow but deep until his cheeks heated under her palms
"I'm scared, doll" Bucky whispered into her panting mouth "I don't know how to get it out of my head"

Lily sighed. She would show him.
Shifting Bucky's hips forward a little, she kissed his neck hard, bumping her forhead against the wall behind them. He smelt of shampoo and heat, the line of his jaw was shadowed with short stubble and she could feel the muscles underneath still a little tense. Lily moved, very slowly as if testing the waters -although it really wasn't necessary, Bucky trusted her completely and he would have let her have him like that anytime she asked or tried to-, her hand down to the fly of Bucky's jeans, undoing them and pushing her hand between the coarse denim and the softer material of his boxers. She smiled as Bucky gasped, pressing into her kind touch.
"There we go," Lily breathed into the soldier's collar "stay this calm for me baby. I promise, I will never hurt you, you're safe." Bucky nodded, the sound of Lily's voice becoming clearer and easier to focus on. The memory of Hydra was starting to fade more and more as Lily moved her hand up and down with a slow, grinding pace that was making Bucky's bottom lip wobble.