The light softly pours onto my shut eyes from the semi-draped curtains. All I can feel is warmth. So secure, so safe. Only a few seconds pass before I realize the position I'm currently laying in.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
Completely stunned, I swiftly look under the blanket to make sure I'm wearing clothes.
Thank god
It took everything out of me to slip from of his tight hold on me and scurry to the bathroom. All it does is leave me absolutely baffled to why I actually slept in the same bed as Ethan. As I stand there I begin to stare at myself in the mirror.
It's said that if you look long enough you won't recognize the person gazing back.
I continue to lock eye contact with myself until I hear a knock come from the door adjacent to my left. "You in there?" I hear him ask gruffly.
With my insides churning nervously, I reply quietly, "Yeah, I was gonna take a shower. Do you need the bathroom?" Silence falls upon us and I can basically hear him rolling his eyes.
"No it's fine your majesty, just help yourself to my water bill." I hear him chuckle as he walks away from the door. My lungs exhale while I wonder why my heart beats so hard near him and Grayson.It's because you're dumb enough to like both boys.
"What am I, in middle school?" I mutter to myself as I slip into the shower.
The water pours down my back while I try to let the water wash away the pain and embarrassment I feel, but all it can do is go over the other night in my mind.Over and over and over.
After another twenty or so minutes another knock sounds on the door.
"Uh, you have a visitor." I hear Ethan say through the door.
"Oh, um, okay. I'll be out in a second!" I awkwardly call out as I stumble over trying to get dressed. His laugh is quiet but husky which causes my cheeks to flush. I open the bathroom door to be met with his cold but open demeanor.
"Hi," I say breathlessly. His eyes interlock with mine even though they're obscured by my damp hair. Moments after moments pass before I work up the courage to ask, "Are you good or?" His eyes widens almost as he's been startled by my question.
"Yeah, uh, your girlfriend is here.. to pick you up." He states, nowhere near trying to hide how bitter he is. I open my mouth to answer but he turns and leads me out of his room. The minute I catch her gaze she lets out an ear piercing squeal and hugs me, kissing me on the cheek. I hug her back but keep eye contact with Ethan the entire time.How can he just see into my soul like this?
"Hey, babe." I let out while finally prying her off of me. It's difficult to focus on Sarah when I can feel his unbothered gaze glaring past mine and at her. It takes a few uncomfortable moments before my "girlfriend" decides it's time to leave. I smile halfheartedly at Ethan while begrudgingly stepping into the open, a plain view of my car and hers. It's becoming apparent quite quickly that I'll have to leave mine here and return to grab it at a later time, which is no disappointment to me. My lips tug into a small smile at my own thoughts, but are interrupted by Sarah's shrill voice, "So, what were you doing here? He's kinda strange don't you think?"
I look over at her unamused and just ignore the question, no point in replying to something ignorant like that. The car door swings open and lets me in as she continues to ponder why I had decided to be here of all places. Increasingly losing interest in being interrogated I sharply reply, "We were just chilling? is that a crime?" Her voice dies down at the sound of how hostile I am. I sigh, feeling bad for raising my voice, "Sorry, I'm just exhausted. Wanna grab breakfast?" My jaw clenches, hoping she'll say no so I don't have to deal with any more awkward small talk.
"Yeah! where do you wanna go? There's this vegan breakfast place I know downtown." I hum and nod in agreement to her plans, and let her drone on about whatever else she needed to talk about. The thing about Sarah is that she isn't inherently a "bad" person, she just has no boundaries. There was a time I thought I really did like her. Granted, it was a long time ago, but I was more in love with the Idea of being normal. I guess that's the mentality that got me here, closeted and in a two year relationship.
I think it's time I tell the truth.
___
Ok.. so that chapter happened lmao. I know, I know I've been absent and left the 2 readers I have hanging, but truly writing, let alone editing, has been rough. I wrote this last night in hopes to hold you all over so PLEASE stay tuned oof.
much much much much much much love, Stephen.
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uneasy (boyxboy)
Fanfictionnot grethan - "you don't have to be afraid" I pleaded. "I'm not." He shot back . - I know we're just friends. trust me I know it. But, when I see him smile, my heart slowly melts more and more. His touch even in the slightest makes my heart flip...