Juxtaposition (unedited)

6

Taehyung's POV

After going to drop off Hoseok and Yoongi food for lunch, I went to my last class of the day since I had a test. I hadn't studied, again, but with the help of one of the guys from class I knew I would be able to pass. All it took was me flirting with him a bit. He was so shy that it really didn't take much. He asked me out on a date and I went with him. I told him how I was having a rough time in class and he told me he could help me out. And now I didn't fail any more tests.

I felt extremely guilty about it, but it gave me one less worry. I even agreed to go on another date with him, but I had found myself canceling often because Hoseok was very demanding of my attention. But I'd do it eventually. I didn't want him to get tired of my bullshit and stop helping me.

I knew how to draw him in though. I smiled at him before the test and afterwards I waited for him to finish turning his in and walked up to him. I told him that he'd saved me and that I was so thankful. I gave him my cutest smile and he looked ready to melt.

Then I told him that I had to go because my mom needed me. It usually worked. I created a whole other Taehyung. One that had to go to church most days and who never really had time to study because his mom was sick and I needed to take care of her.

Yeah, I know it's wrong. But I had learned that to get what I needed sometimes I had to change the truth a bit.

A part of me liked that Taehyung better. I wanted to be a good person with potential who was just struggling because they were busy doing something good. I didn't want to be someone who was manipulative and who was too afraid to be honest about things. I didn't want to be the Taehyung whose parents made him afraid. Whose boyfriend reminded him so much of them.

I just wanted people to not see the real me because the real me sucked. He was weak and pathetic and depressing. If I had to lie, then so be it.

I got home and decided to get ready. I put on makeup because I knew Hoseok liked it when I dolled up for him. I picked out something nice to wear even though it was just dinner at Namjoon and Yoongi's place. Hoseok liked to buy me nice things to wear. He said if he was going to have to look at me he didn't want me dressing like shit. So I always wore nice things.

And that felt great. Made me feel attractive. Made me feel desired by him. I loved knowing that he did that for me. Just for me.

I loved knowing that he'd be thinking about me the whole time. That when we were finally alone he'd be dying to fuck me because I looked that good.

Not that things always worked out in my favor. Sometimes I was tired. But I took the bad with the good.

I drove to their apartment and knocked on the door. Namjoon greeted me with a smile.

"Do you need help with anything Namjoon? Cleaning, cooking, anything...?"

He smiled and gestured that I sit on the couch. "Yea. You can help me later, but first I want to talk to you about something."

I instantly got nervous at those words. Usually when someone had to talk to me about something it was about something I was doing wrong.

"I've been thinking about going back to college, but I don't know if I should."

I was relieved this wasn't about me, but the mention of college made me prepare my mind to make sure the conversation kept on being about Namjoon and for him not to ask me how I've been doing.

"That sounds like a good idea Joon. You should. You'd get better pay and you get to call yourself a professor, which just sounds cool," I said with a smile.

He laughed. "So, you think it's a good idea? I mean the only problem is that it ain't cheap. I have some money saved but I'm still going to have to get a loan. I don't know if I should just settle with what I have. I'm afraid I won't be as good of a teacher if I'm taking classes while teaching."

I shook my head. "Joon, if there's anyone that's smart enough and hardworking enough to balance both, it's you."

Namjoon smiled at me. "You're so sweet Tae. This is why I like you."

I smiled. It felt nice knowing that. There was nothing more that I loved than to be appreciated.

"Do you think we should cook something, or should we just buy something from Jin's restaurant?" Namjoon asked.

"I don't have any money on me," I said.

"I'll pay," he quickly said. "I don't want to cook to be honest. Well what I mean to say is I can't cook."

I nodded. "Buying it is then."

Namjoon and I waited until Yoongi called to say he was on his way before going to buy food.

Jin smiled when he saw us. "Back again so soon boys?"

"I can't cook, and I need food so can you please do your thing," Namjoon said with a smile. His dimples looked so cute and they made me feel happier just by looking at them.

We were back at his apartment and Hoseok and Yoongi got there soon after.

As soon as Hoseok saw me he pulled me towards him and sat me down on his lap. His arm was wrapped around my waist and he kissed me.

"You look good," he said when he pulled away.

I smiled. "I know how you like this shirt."

He nodded. "You'll get your reward for that later."

It was usually like that with us. I did something he liked, I got a reward. Or I could choose to get rid of a punishment. I hated punishments.

So I tried to be good. That way we both got what we wanted.