My lord and his mistress

Chapter 6

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I had continued working with Miranda. I tried to carry on per usual. I sadly spent a lot of time in my room. This week was particularly uneventful. I had heard rumors I would be switched from the kitchen to cleaning. I asked him if any of it was true. He wasn't giving me a straight answer. But, that evening he had slipped into my bedroom to tell me otherwise. I was one of the best assistants in the kitchen so there was absolutely no way that would happen.

" I have one question, if you will." He nodded his head, as if for me to continue.

" Why don't you treat me like the other girls? I have seen and heard what happens. What makes me different?" there was a long stretch of silence.

" You're off limits."

" Why, if you don't mind me asking."

" Because Bella, I might actually love it." I was stunned. I didn't know how to react, nor that he would react that way. I knew he held me to a higher standard than that of his other maids but... this was something different all together. I couldn't wrap my head around what he had said. He hadn't really looked at me until now. I had so many questions... none of which could or would ever get answered. 

" So,-"

" Yes, Bella?" 

" What does that mean?"

"... It means... anything I would have with you would be immoral. I can't even control myself around you, but you've been a little too dense to notice such things." I opened my mouth to say something but I saw the darkness in his eyes. I wanted to say that what he had said about me was mean. But not now. He hadn't said that because he disliked me. Or to even be mean. The tension in the room was so thick, Maybe even speech wouldn't break the silence. I saw his sharp and emotionless features in the colorful soft twilight. It was getting darker. I did something even I didn't expect to do. I placed my hand over his own. His irises were almost gone. That's how dark they had gotten.  

" Please don't make this any harder for me. " he whispered. I was ready to argue until I felt his soft lips pressed against mine. For a moment, I didn't know what to do. My lips weren't very experienced. I still couldn't process the things he had said. I felt the caress of his arm and his body against my own. This feeling was something a bit more new.  I melted in his hand like silly putty. I couldn't control these feelings he was giving me either. He slowly pulled away, savoring our kiss. My breathe was heavy, not used to this. 

"I love you, Bella. That is why I can't have you." His words angered me. They hurt like sharp jagged pieces of glass embedded in my heart.

" Than get out." I whispered. I wanted to keep my calm and hope for the best, but  I couldn't look at him right now. He stared at me, not understanding.

"I said get out!" I yelled. He stood and left. I couldn't sleep. I  felt the warmth of his lips but the bite of his words that weren't meant to hurt. I couldn't think right. I also couldn't breathe properly. I ran into my bathroom and splashed cold water on my face. I wanted to sink to the floor and cry my heart out. 

I sank to the floor and held my head in my hands. I didn't mean to hurt her with my words. They were real. They were my real feelings. I would love to be with her. Keep her for myself. I lived in a world where I couldn't pick and choose who I wanted to marry. I felt hot tears slip down my cheeks.

" You look like absolute shit. What happened?" 

" Please leave." 

" Tell me what happened." she whispered

" It's none of your business. go." I looked up to find her naked, in bed with 2 maids. They both looked at me. Katy and Elena were feeling up her chest and other parts. 

" It actually is my business. I'm your wife." she murmured. Katy's lips moved down to her more sensitive parts and made her moan lustfully. I left. I couldn't handle any of this anymore. I most importantly didn't want her or her company. It was disgusting that people would see her as a status symbol. If you were with a woman as rich and beautiful as her, you were certainly blessed. I would like to think so, even though it's not. I left the house, headed for the church. I kneeled in heavy prayer all night long, until the morning. 

I hadn't even gotten sleep. I went along with my normal schedule. We made breakfast  and all taken a break. I was tired, but that didn't stop me from completing my tasks. I noticed this would be the last day Romeo was really here. I did like him... but his questionable actions made me suspicious of him. That he wasn't just here for company. In other words... other motives. I couldn't figure it out. I couldn't figure out my lord either. I didn't let things change but ever since he kissed me, I don't know what made me crave more. His mysterious behavior or my lord's stronghold on his feelings. I don't want to fall victim to either of them. But I somehow am. For BOTH of them. And it was  extremely scary. I went sneaking off around the house into the last person I wanted to see: His mistress.

" Move along now, bella. Supper must be ready by 3." I don't know why I hated her so much. She was so annoying. I can't even wonder how my lord could have married her. She was gorgeous, but that was it. It stopped there. I nodded and went to make said food. But it seemed a lot of work stopped when our guest, Romeo himself stepped into the kitchen. Everyone looked at him, attempting to analyze why he would even be here.

" Supper is being fixed, m'lord, but if you would feign patience and wait-"

" I'm here to apologize, Bella. For those things I did and said. For all you do, you aren't given enough respect or gratitude." I didn't think he would do that here or at this time.

" Okay, Romeo. Now please go rest in your room." I said. He nodded and left. Mandy took over from where I left off and I was able to take a 15 minute break. I sat in my bedroom, thinking. Why had he apologized so openly? He assaulted me discreetly so such measures were unnecessary. Did he just do it so everyone would know he said it? What was happening to me? I had once been a kid, allowed to breathe and free of such interactions. Yeah I would be under the care of my lord but... that didn't technically mean I was safe.