ᴄʀᴜᴛᴄʜᴇs || ᴊ.ᴊᴋ + ᴋ.ᴛʜ ✔️

twelve: december the first

He woke up early. But it wasn't on purpose.

Taehyung's eyes fluttered open and straightaway he felt a sinking feeling in his chest. Slowly draping his legs over the side of his bed, he picked up his phone from the short dresser within arms reach and turned the screen on.

December the first.

In his heart he already knew what day it was even before he'd opened his eyes, and it hurt enough then, but for some reason looking at the date in written words and numbers really made it sink in.

"December the first," Taehyung whispered to himself. A text message from Hoseok caused his phone to buzz.

Hobi-ssi:

taetae good morning :)

i hope youll be ok today...

pls take care <3

He saw it a sweet gesture, and he most certainly appreciated it, but he just couldn't bring himself to respond, instead setting the phone carefully down beside him. He heard a quiet knock on the door. Turning his head, Taehyung's sleepy gaze drifted over to where his grandmother was gingerly poking her head into the room. She smiled every so slightly upon seeing Taehyung awake.

"Good morning, Tae."

The boy rubbed his eyes and struggled to smile back at her. "Morning, Grandma," he said. Chaerin sighed.

"Have you made a decision?"

"I'm going, Grandma."

"Are you sure?"

"I'll be alright, Grandma. I'll visit Mom after school."

Taehyung could see the concern pouring from his grandmother's kind eyes, and so he got to his feet and made his way over to her to give her a hug. A long, warm hug. Chaerin patted her grandson's back and he buried his face into her shoulder.

"I miss her more every year."

"I know you do, Tae," she whispered, gently ruffling the boy's hair. He was at least several inches taller than her, but at times like these Taehyung looked and sounded like such a young, little boy. Especially to Chaerin, who wanted nothing more right now than for Tae to make it through the day. It would be a long one. She knew that, he knew that. But December 1st came every year without fail. There was no fast forwarding it, or skipping it, just like no one can skip the rising and setting of the sun...

"I'll see you in the evening, then?"

"Mhm. I'll try to be back before it gets dark."

Chaerin gave him a soft kiss on his forehead. "I hope so, love. I'll miss you dearly..."

***

He ended up arriving at his classroom mere seconds before the bell rang, as his steps had been as slow as slow could be. And he tried. Taehyung really did try to stay focused in class, but throughout the lectures his mind wandered, and his heart ached, and it was a battle in and of itself to not picture his mother's face, else he should start to tear up. He could still feel the tears anyway, just waiting patiently behind a threadbare wall till they should be let free. Not now...not here.

Apparently it was more obvious than he realized. As not one, not two, not three, but four different people approached him to ask if he were feeling alright. And again, the concern was touching, and Tae wished he could appreciate it more, but perhaps it was still too early, perhaps he still needed time to fall into a comfortable pace. It always did take some time.

"Uhh...Taehyung?"

And here was the fifth.

Standing up from his seat as he intended to head to the cafeteria for lunch, Taehyung turned in the direction of the boy who had spoken to him. It was Yoongi. Pleasantly surprised, Tae actually found it in himself to smile - a tiny smile, but at least it wasn't entirely faked.