ᴄʀᴜᴛᴄʜᴇs || ᴊ.ᴊᴋ + ᴋ.ᴛʜ ✔️

twenty: from fragile lips falls the truth untold

It took some time. A lot of time, actually. A lot of time, and a lot of thinking on Jimin's part. But come the day after winter break was over, he decided he was ready.

And so there on the porch which sat beside the archery range he waited. For everyone else to leave, for Yoongi to realize he was there and put down his bow.

The thing is, Yoongi sensed from the moment Jimin stepped out onto that porch what he was here for. And he wouldn't lie, it made him a little anxious. Sad, too, because he managed to catch a glimpse of Jimin's disheartened expression. He wasn't even watching Yoongi practice like he usually did. Too caught up his own thoughts, Yoongi guessed. And he was right. He knew he was right.

Without saying anything, Yoongi sat down beside the despondent orange-haired boy.

"So you're ready now?"

"Yeah," Jimin replied ever so softly. "It'll kill me if I keep it bottled up forever, and you're so willing to listen to my problems for some reason..."

Yoongi offered a small smile of encouragement, but it went unnoticed by Jimin. Nevertheless, he didn't allow his own spirits to be dowsed so easily. He wanted to remain positive for Jimin's sake. He felt he needed to, especially since he could already feel whatever this boy was about to tell him would hurt.

Jimin was quiet for a few minutes. Hugging his legs, he stared at the ground as he dug through his mind for ideas on how to make this story brief. He already felt guilty for taking Yoongi's precious time.

He knew he had to start somewhere.

"I've told you Jungkook and I are close, right?"

"Of course," Yoongi replied.

"...we've been friends since we were babies, practically. Grew up together, went to school together, hung out all the time and did everything together." He let out a soft breath that almost sounded like a laugh. "I still remember getting so mad at him in our first year of high school, 'cus that's when I realized he was really getting tall and I hadn't grown at all...he never missed an opportunity to tease me for it, either..."

He got lost in the moment, the nostalgia.

"Jungkook grew up...but never left me behind."

Permitting himself a smile, he glanced at Yoongi but quickly turned away.

"Granted, I didn't leave him behind, either," he said. "I mean, why would I? He meant everything to me. We were each other's crutches long before the accident. I loved him like a brother, an irreplaceable friend. I knew he felt the same. I never needed to ask, it was just something I could feel, something I...thought we felt the same, y-...you know?"

Yoongi could hear that tremor in Jimin's voice. The one that surfaced whenever the boy was near to the point of tears. But he was strong, at least for now, and kept them at bay.

"I didn't know what he felt towards me was different," Jimin said. "I was such a freaking idiot, that I didn't notice the way he looked at me was different. I was so stupid, so, so stupid to not realize how much it probably seemed I was leading him on...I didn't mean to, I swear..." He curled his bottom lip, then bit down on it in frustration. "I didn't mean to, Yoongi, I really didn't mean to. The cheek kisses and cuddles and hugs and everything I said to him I meant from my heart but not...in that way..."

It was so evident. In Jimin's choice of words, in the bitter repetition of his regret. He was against himself. Beside himself with self-hatred. Jimin bit harder on his bottom lip.

"The day the accident happened was the worst day of both of our lives. The second guests were allowed to see him, I rushed in there, because obviously I had been waiting...and Jungkook was already close to crying and he just burst into tears the moment he saw me." He chuckled in spite of himself. "Relieved to see me, I guess... Really...relieved. And he was so torn, Yoongi, torn because he had just been told about the state of his leg, and essentially how one of the two most important things in his life had been utterly destroyed. Even if I wanted to, I couldn't imagine what that must have felt like...could you?"