"hyeya, won't you say you're sorry
someday very far away then
will you not say it in the end of the end
so even this painful time right now
as we smile later on
we can call it a good memory
hyeya, you said with the heart of a good friend
that you will love me forever
don't say those words ever again
they are so light to you but too heavy for me
this heart must have given you a hard time
i'll back off a little, i'll wait
i'll stand far away, so you can be comfortable
i beg like this
hyeya, how can you leave?
cruelly saying goodbye with those smiling eyes
it kills me and my breath stops
the melody that used to make us happy
it's still so glorious
please don't abandon me, don't abandon me
i don't want to live
what should i do? what should i do without you?
living while pretending i don't know you
i didn't know it would be insanely saddening like this
hyeya, how can you leave me?
with those cruel words of goodbye
i'll resent you for leaving
oh please, don't go hyeya
living while pretending i didn't know you
i didn't know it would be insanely saddening like this
hyeya, you are leaving me
with just the cruel greeting of goodbye
i'll resent you and resent you
please
please don't leave, hyeya
don't go, hyeya"
-
jonghyun.. you said these words to us. this was such a beautiful performance, one of the best in my opinion. i've always loved it. but just last night i watched it again, but this time i payed attention to the lyrics. shouldn't we be saying this to you? you shouldn't be the one saying this. how could you leave us like that? i don't resent you. i resent what you did. how could you leave all of us blingers and shawols behind? i know you're in a better place now, at least i try to think that, but still. how could you leave us behind? it's been almost a year and i still can't get you out of my mind. is it wrong to mourn someone for this long, even if you've never met them face to face? if you've never had a real conversation? if they never knew you even existed? i don't know. but i do know that my mind is still mainly thinking of you every. single. day. i don't know what to do to stop this. but do i want to? maybe this is a good thing, the thought of you always being there. it makes me not feel alone at times. maybe it's good that i won't forget you. you'll always be in my mind, honey. forever and always.
