Inner monsters

Shapeshifter

Number 1 let the shapeshifter infect
She didn't know no one in this world is perfect
Therefore she could never be loved by all
And so she stumbled until she did painfully fall •••

She never liked to know that others didn't like or even respect her. She wanted to not just think but know that everyone at least enjoyed her presence; she (simply put) wanted to achieve something impossible, for every single person she ever crossed paths with to like her. It was only when she realised this that her inner monster started to dwell.

As time went on she got more observant and therefore learnt more about her fellow humans. It didn't take her long to realise that if she wanted everyone to eventually admire her she'd need to buy the latest clothes, electronic devices and bags. She'd have to watch every popular show on television and subscribe to every popular YouTuber. She'd have to have a decent number of followers on all her social media apps. You name it. She wanted it.

This wasn't that hard for her, coming from a fairly wealthy family and all. Once she tried all of that she learnt something else.

That wasn't enough.

This is where her inner monster really began to shine through.

She had to vary her personality. Change it for each person she spoke to. Each personality she grew shone when she realised what she had to do to grasp someone's friendship and keep it.

She didn't like this part. She would much rather have everyone enjoy her company while she was being herself but that would obviously NEVER happen so she had to change.

Some began to believe she only changed her personality so frequently for attention, others became suspicious but all she wanted was friends. She began to generally be kind and polite yet funny and loud towards everyone as she learnt that human beings shared a common liking towards kindness and a sense of humour. She (however) did still put on a metaphorical mask for every person to compliment their needs; yet even after all this trouble she couldn't be liked by everyone. I guess that's just because to have her company appreciated she must be perfect which is quite frankly impossible. And that fact was the one thing she never learned.

Despite the growth over time, her inner monster still controlled her as the host and impacted her life far too much for her well being to be alright. It gave her too many masks and bodies and drilled the idea into her head that one mask fits one personality therefore, she shall be loved by all. That was a lie. Due to how desperate she actually was, only herself could be gullible enough to believe the horrendous lie that lay in front of her.

She wanted nobody to know about the mental situation she was in. She thought that one else needed and still to this day needs to know about the dwelling monster inside, forcing her to become someone new every hour. She didn't want anyone else to know in case her monster was infectious.

She now wants nothing more than to ensure not just that everyone loves her but that she's the only one this badly ruined by the shapeshifter.